Sunday, May 30, 2010

Days go by

Dear family and friends,

The battle of our mahatanista, Lee, is over. She died yesterday surrounded by her family. Her daughter (our daughter-in-law) Sandy, and Sandy's sister Barbara, were holding her hands, and Murray, her husband of over 60 years, and their son Lawrence, were standing by, as was our son Harvey, and Barbara's significant other, Matt. Our hearts are with them. Lee timed it so that all could be together, managing to wait through Harvey's work-related trips to Israel and Norway, so he could be there at Sandy's side to support her through her grief—and her relief that her mother was free of pain at last and that her ever-faithful father could rest, too.

So life goes on. I participate in a special way in this milestone event as I think of my own demise, probably sooner rather than later (though I admit that I feel better now than I did a year ago when I was on terrible meds), and I hope for myself and my family that the slope can be steep at the end. It would be good if there were ways (well, there ARE ways, but they are illegal) to speed the inevitable. Lee asked for this relief many times. Yet her last days were not without joy. She asked even a few days ago to be wheeled outside on a recliner so she could enjoy the flowers she loved.

Lee and I had a special bond, and I will cherish that in memory. What an indomitable will she had!

On the brighter side, our dear almost-daughter Dawn visited with her significant other Brian yesterday. We ordered pizza to test out this source, Abeetza Pizza, which we have heard is good. It WAS good, loaded with fresh vegetables. But the crust, because of the leakiness of the veggies, was a little soggy. I must ask them which veggies would allow the crust to hold firm. Or what I could do at home to firm it up. I had the oven on high while Merwin and Brian went for the pizza, then turned it off when they arrived, and slipped the pizza onto a cookie tray to stay warm until we were ready (about 5 minutes). We also had one of Merwin's great salads and then ice cream and cookies for dessert. Nice and easy.

I needed a rest during the day and again during Dawn's visit. Merwin regaled her and Brian with stories of his fabulous transfers of 33 records to CD and then to his iPod. He transferred some CDs to Dawn, who was pleased to get them. She is hoping ot trim the number of her possessions, but I keep giving her—or loaning her—books I think she can use. I gave her some of Patti Tana's poetry because Dawn, having had a public reading this past spring, was asked by someone in the audience to join Patti on stage at the Tilles Center at C. W. Post this fall for a program he is organizing. It's always great to see one's children getting ahead, and I am proud of them all, including the ones who are ours because we adopted each other as family. Blood is strong, but love is even stronger. I always say that to our nephews, Merwin's sister's sons.

Below, I hope, is a photo of Dawn and Brian.

It's going to be another beautiful day today. Love to all,
Bernice




















1 comment:

  1. Awww......thank you so much for this posting! (You can see I'm finally catching up on your blogs!)

    It was so lovely to see you, and we have to do it again soon! I didn't think the Pizza was soggy at all---it was delicious!

    The poetry Merwin burned for me is *wonderful* and I'm having so much fun listening to the other ones as well.....

    I'm so sorry about your friend.....I'm sure your connection with her made her very, very happy--as it does with me---so much Love you give, Bernice! We love you back intensely! <3

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