Fading a bit

Here I am with Sammy, the best dog in the world, showing off, for Nick, my new haircut, which the inimitable Paul shaped for me last Thursday. This was my first haircut since last July, just days before my fall and long hospitalization, which left me with a bald head and a hole that took a few months to heal. None of this shows.


Dear Friends and Family,

I have to admit to some setbacks. Last night, after we went to see Midnight in Paris by Woody Allen, our free Tuesday movie courtesy of our 3-way Optimum card, Merwin left me, at my urging, to see if MP Taverna could seat us. It was about 7 p.m. I slowly using my cane got outside of the Roslyn Movie Theater OK, but as I tried walking outside, I stumbled a bit, feeling wavery. A woman standing on line to enter for the next showing of one of the three films there caught me and asked if I needed help. I did indeed. I asked her to help me to the next free sign post, where I clung till Merwin returned. MP Taverna was chock full of diners, he reported, with every table occupied, so no go. Merwin had to walk me to a bench, while he got the car, and I had a nice chat with a woman in her eighties whose daughter had led her to the bench. She showed me the depressions in her head, very much like mine, except her surgeon placed one just below her hairline. My two depressions are well hidden now by my hair. When Merwin pulled up, I could not reach him without help. He had to park and come for me. Oh my.

It could be because of my very low blood levels. To reduce the spleen I was taking 6 HU a day. Now I am down to 2 starting today until after my next blood draw report, next Wednesday.

How did I like the movie? It is an educated snob's delight, I might say. If you know who all the many people the Allen character meets, you get a great kick out of it. But but but. Merwin liked it a lot, and I certainly enjoyed it. But the hero is engaged to a dreadful woman. Why doesn't he see that? Of course, not seeing the dreadfulness of someone you love is not unusual, but Allen really laid it on, dissing her badly. And her parents! Greedy mom and Republican dad.

Merwin is reading (and not enjoying) A Hundred Years of Solitude, which is an early, perhaps the first great example of Magical Realism, and Woody Allen's film is a late instance of magical realism. OK, fun, but forgettable. Weigh in, please. Most people I know LOVED the film.

Today, I didn't go for a walk. I stayed home and tried to work on the review I am to write about an edition. I have lots of opinions about it, but I will be sure to write something useful for them. The hurtful part is that in this heavily annotated edition of Hamlet, there is not one mention of my work or the work of our hamletworks.org team. I gathered together from my CV only those items on Hamlet I have worked on since converting to Shakespeare in 1976: 4 closely packed pages. I will submit those pages with my report. I will get my chance, though, to suggest elements from hamletworks.org that they should know about. I have several more days to work on it, including the weekend.

I also heard from Mimi at SQ for clarification of two items, and I saw I had made a mistake, which I corrected, thanks to her queries. Will this long complicated essay be flawless? Hardly, but the central thesis is strong, I believe. Let's see.

Being nervous makes me want to eat constantly, which I did all day. For supper, I finished up the last of the matzo by making gefrúste (freshened) matzo. Delicious, and I ate a good amount, as did Merwin.He was happy; he's easy to please.

Now off to see a TCM movie.

Love to all,
Bernice

So Many Photos!

From the top: Arthur and his new bike, a gift from his wife Debbie. He's a happy man because this bike, his third, has features of the first, lively but no highway driving), and the second, OK for the highway but not as sprightly. Below: Erika with chip, Tamar with chip and Marty with Jake—3 of the 9 grandchildren they have.

Dear Friends and Family,

Highlight of the weekend: Sylvia and Marty came with their son Ari's three children, Erika 5, Tamar almost 3, and Jake 3 months, plus Dahlia, a 12-year-old neighbor to help. The baby of course smiled right away, showing his dimples. While all the others were outside looking for fish in the pond, I spoke to Jake, who was lying on a blanket on the floor, and he was responding with smiles, leg and arm waves and the rest of the limited repertoire of a 3-month old. The girls were shy at first, clinging to Sylvia or Dahlia, but I just spoke to them normally, as I always do to children, and they gradually relaxed. A huge bag of pita chips helped. We devoured them in short order. Next was a visit to our present closet, a cedar closet hidden behind another closet, where I tuck away things I find for giving as well as store winter clothes and such. Before too long we found a few things that they liked. All except Merwin then went to Tappen Beach, where the stones, the water, and the jungle gym appealed to the girls. I watched Jake, sleeping in his stroller, until it turned out that supper would have to be prepared. I phoned Merwin, who picked me up, and in the half-hour or so before the cousins returned to the house Merwin and I prepared a quick meal. I added a can of tomatoes to a zucchini and eggplant sauce I had made the day before (the veggies sauteed with onion and garlic and spices and then pureed in the blender). We cooked pasta and Merwin made the salad. All were well fed. Merwin and I were exhausted, but happy. Today is Tuesday and the pots are still in the sink! (Note: our splendid Sonia washed them all.)

Monday, the ms. I am to review arrived, and I see I am going to have a lot to say—probably more than they want. But I enjoy thinking about the issues and expressing my ideas about learning that have energized me throughout my career. The extremely full apparatus in the ms. qualifies the edition for a slot on hamletworks.org. As usual, the editors (both acquaintances/friends) do not cite hamletworks.org; my book on Hamlet on film, TV and audio; or any of the many essays and reviews I have written about Hamlet. I am used to this neglect—but not exactly inured to it.

In the early afternoon we went to P. C. Richards to buy a much-needed air-conditioner for upstairs. When we had the Mitsubishi units installed downstairs, Merwin thought it was not worthwhile to spend the money on one for upstairs, a much more difficult installation. I disagreed, but he had his way. Finally I urged him to buy a window unit (actually an in-wall unit, replacing a defunct unit, and when he saw the light he went to work in his methodical way and found one we would buy, a Fredericks. He checked out Amazon.com and then we went to P. C. Richards, where the price was a bit lower: not in stock but should be there today or in a few days. Merwin phoned a carpenter who has done work for us, who, after we bring the unit home, will come and make an assessment of the installation. A good job in process.

Laury phoned to say that a film of the Merry Wives of Windsor performed at the Globe Theatre was playing at a few theaters, including the one at Port Washington. We joined her and her friend Steve and enjoyed the performance thoroughly, though there were a lot of cuts, and the staging bothered me: too many bells and whistles tacked on to the plain Globe stage. Sam Wanamaker, the originator of the Globe project, would be rolling around in his grave. The new Globe stage was to reveal much about how Shakespeare may have used the stage in his day. No way was this staging anywhere near his.

Laury invited us in for a snack, but we weren't hungry till we rolled through Roslyn and discovered that a new Greek restaurant, MP Taverna, that had just gotten top rating in the NY Times, was buzzing with activity. We arrived, as the hostess told us, just after the manager had told the staff that walk-ins without reservations could be served. We each ordered one of their small plates, and I had a glass of wine to boot. They serve many many wines in 1/2 glasses: idel for me. We went home very tired but happy.

And so it goes. family, Shakespeare, work, play, food, friends.

Love to all,

Bernice

Lots of photos to share

At the top, Jesús and his son Pau. Pau was injured during a basketball game and persisted anyway. Though Pau could not play in the last game, he received from the manager this splendid trophy for the team, which won largely due to his playing during the series, and you can see how happy he is. The bottom picture are Leah, Audrey and Sammy. The girls are Vaughan's grandchildren who live her in San Diego/ We have a dog named Sammy also, but being the best dog in the world he requires no feeding or walking. We'll take a photo of him sometime.

Dear friends and family,

I remember the day Pau was born: I was so excited when Jesùs phoned me from Valencia (I was at the Shakespeare conference in Stratford-upon-Avon and he called for me at the desk). Jesús was explaining why he could not be at the conference: boy was he a happy man. I have known and loved Jesús since the day Camille at the Folger Shakespeare Library mentioned to him that since he was working on Hamlet for his PhD dissertation, he might like to meet me. We met and bonded immediately. To get more details, Merwin, who was in Stratford also, and I phoned Jesùs later in the evening from a phone booth outside the theater where we were seeing a play.

Since we first met, we have been close colleagues and friends. Jesús and family has visited us, including Carme, born two years after Pau, and his delightful parents, José and Isabel, at whose house we stayed when we visited them. Of course with his beautiful wife, Xelo. Jesús came to visit us in Glen Head after the Shakespeare meeting this past spring and attended my talk at the NYPL. We worked on his additions to hamletworks.org.

I didn't know the joy that my shift from medieval literature to Shakespeare would give me. Best thing I ever did for my spiritual and academic life.

I overslept this morning—amazing. Merwin began to get worried when he had heard nothing from me by 10 a.m. I had been awake a few times, but always happily snuggled into my blanket and dozed off again. I think I am feeling better on the lower dose of chemo.

As planned, yesterday we went to Kiraku for lunch with Doris and Stan. The staff greets me happily: "Hello Bernice." We were the last ones there for lunch and had the pleasure of seeing the staff being served, watching with curiosity to see what they were eating—huge mounds of whatever it was, a variety among the 10 or so serving folk. Chopsticks flashing.

After that, lots of resting, some reading, some computer work, and more resting, because we were going to services that evening, a rarity since my downturn. I wanted to go to acknowledge, by reciting the Kaddish, the anniversary of the death of Eve, my sister's daughter. Also, we, along with about 50 others, had been invited by a couple we know to attend for the announcement of the coming wedding of their daughter. It wasn't an occasion for a present, but knowing we would not go to the wedding, I wanted to give them something. I have been selecting gifts from our great store of objects, and for this couple I chose a lovely elephant with trunk up. We sat in the last row, but at some point, Rabbi Lee, from the Bima called out a "Hello Bernice" to me. At the Oneg afterward, I indulged in a glass of wine and piece of cheesecake, and as I sat at the table, the dozen or so people I know came to greet me, to say how well I look, to express pleasure in seeing me there. Felt good. Just stay away for a time and come back and you get this treatment: the prodigal son plot line.

Tomorrow Sylvia will be coming with three of her nine grandchildren: These are her son Ari's children. He and Monica are in NY for a wedding. I don't think Ari can come to see us—he and Monica have other family commitments for their brief stay.

It's a bright and sunny day, and I have been smiling from the moment I got up.I hope you are too!

Love to all,
Bernice

Read more >> Options >>

Friday!

Pond Arrowhead, taken some time ago. The pond keeps giving. We hope it is friendly for the little goldfish Merwin bought to replace the ones that had, unfortunately, died.

Dear Friends and Family

I haven't had a chance to write since Monday! I need to write mainly for myself, to tell the truth, to keep track of what I am doing.

Last night we saw/heard Lucia di Lammermoor with Natalie Dessay. This is one of the HD operas we missed when we could have seen it at a local theater, so we were pleased to see it on our own TV. I saw it the same way as I heard it as a child when my parents, every single Saturday, had the opera on our radio (no TV in those early days). That is, without titles. I couldn't see them and be in a comfortable position. But I enjoyed it enormously anyway, and I liked being able to comment as the silliness of the story unfolded. What a dummy Lucia is, but what a voice Dessay has. It's amazing that so much comes from such a tiny body.

Earlier in the evening I had the pleasure of hearing Keith Obermann, one of my favorite commentators, who always has such interesting guests. He's now on the Current channel, not widely available, but he's happier working for Al Gore than for whichever company owns MSNBC.

I have the feeling that the higher dose of chemo has shrunk my spleen. It's still huge, but maybe a 7th month pregnancy size rather than 9th month.

Monday and Tuesday I spent mostly working on the draft of my SQ essay. Yet a few more changes I wanted to make, mostly my own errors and lack of clarity. Oh my. I sent in the last notes just before Folger closing time. But I got my reward: after months of working with Mimi at SQ without her saying anything positive or negative about my essay—just very business like, she finally wrote me this note:

I so appreciate all of your time and hard work on this essay, Bernice. I think it looks so good; I hope that you are pleased with it as well! We are thrilled to have it in SQ.

Wow! Of course, I am thrilled too and told her so. I have enjoyed every minute of working on the research, writing, shaping my argument, revising and editing—and now it will be here in August. Hooray!

Laury came over on Wed. and we worked a little on our Macbeth chapter. I wrote to TOFT (Theater on Film and Tape) and asked about any new Macbeth videos since we got the last list from them: they will soon have the BAM version I reviewed. It will be wonderful to see the "film" version and compare it to the recollection I have.

Nick has been doing a great job with hamletworks, clarifying the connection to MIT, adding web sites, very much taking the lead, for which I am very grateful. He will be seeing our other main editor in Prague. How grand for them to be able to present our site there.

I bought tickets for "War Horse" at Lincoln Center (we're members). I am feeling more ambitious about going to the theater.

Yesterday I got my first haircut since I was shaved for surgery last August. Merwin took me to Paul Anthony Aesthetics where I was greeted very warmly and sweetly by all, from the nice man who parks the car, to the staff and of course by Paul himself, who is a friend. It felt so good to be there, to be greeted that way, and to get my hair into shape. Having washed it this morning, I am not sure about it, but it'll be OK.

Sonia could not come yesterday but will be here today. And today we go out to lunch with Doris and Stan—at my favorite: Kiraku.

Oh, one more thing, I got a message from Bedford Press asking me to review a book on Hamlet they are hoping to publish. I know and admire the author well, so that will be a pleasure—as well as providing a little income. The ms. hasn't arrived yet, but I expect it any day.

Thanks for reading!

Love to all,

Bernice

After the weekend

Day lillies outside of Merwin's study windows.

Dear Friends and Family,

I wanted to write as soon as we returned from NYC but I found the latest i.e. last version of my “At Sea” essay waiting for me. I spent most of Monday on that. Yes, I found a few of the press's errors, but I also found sentences of mine that were not as clear as they should have been. I am not sure they will accept changes rather than corrections of their errors. I have to work on the piece again today, but I sent Mimi a preliminary list of changes. Oh my! I am the opposite of Bertram Russell and Mozart—besides the fact that they were geniuses and I am far from that—in the sense that they wrote once and that was it. No corrections or clarifications needed. I write draft after draft.

On Friday we made it as far as Port Washington in pouring rain, only to discover that the trains were not running because of flooding on the tracks. After some hemming and hawing, we returned home and I cobbled together a supper. We were unable to meet Michelle at Szechuan Gourmet. So we got up early the next morning and got to the City in time to rest a bit before our last concert of our Philharmonic series. We met Naomi and afterward went across the street to a hotel restaurant where we had a very pleasant supper. I had a vodka drink, which I am not supposed to have, but once in a while can't hurt. We were mourning our last philharmonic concert; from now on we will go to Tilles, 10 minutes from Glen Head.

At the philharmonic, we also ran into Lore, a friend from RSNS, whose daughter is still undergoing the procedures following a stem-cell transplant, a cure for myelo-fibrosis, the disease I have. Because this procedure is so life threatening, they wont do it to anyone over 70. If it doesn't kill you, it cures you entirely of the disease.

On Sunday we prepared for a visit from the Stark family. Isabel is 16 and will be an intern studying at Rockefeller University; she will be staying in our apartment, with the board's permission, weekdays this summer. We will come in on weekends. A lot of sheet-switching will have to occur, but it is worth it to help this bright young girl, whom we have known since she was born. Her mother worked for Merwin at Algorex. The Starks, Michelle, Gene, Gabby and Isabelle, treated us to a lovely lunch at the Bryant Park Grill, across the street from our apartment.

Afterward, we walked the short distance to the NYPL entrance. The Starks had never been inside this beautiful building. With them I entered the Allen Room, a study room for scholars, removed my books from my shelf and put them on the return table, and took my papers and things. Then we walked to the main reading rooms where I returned my key-card for the room. A sad moment.

Before we left the City, Rachael came over for a brief visit. She helped me remove winter clothes from the closets; her parents will pick them up this weekend and take them to Connecticut. They'll bring them to Glen Head when they visit. Finally, Merwin and I took the bus to Penn Station, and I found that I was fearful of the familiar escalator. My balance is so bad. So we found an elevator, They are not so easy to discover.

Home again in Glen Head. Dave went shopping for us on Monday, and now we are fully stocked again. Merwin is considering whether he feels more energetic now that the radiation is over and done with. Perhaps a little. It will get better as days go by.

Once the SQ business is over, I will return to hamletworks.org and Macbeth. The very good news is that with the higher dose of chemo, the pain is entirely gone.

Love to all,

Bernice

Too many days

When I neglect my blog, I accumulate images, so here are some recent ones: The clematis (closeup and long shot) has decided to climb up the unused string that Merwin uses to pull down the bird feeder to replenish it. Birds find enough to eat now without his help—though I miss the visitors to the feeder. Robins are gorging themselves on the service berry. But they are not in view from my windows. Below the clematis, our oldest son, Harvey, and his splendid wife, Sandy, are celebrating their 31st anniversary! How can that be?

Dear friends and family,

The blog is for me, as much as it is for you: I need to write things down to remember them. So given that a few days have passed, I have to admit that I don't remember a lot.

Laury and I finished (we think) with Measure for Measure. We urged the copy-editor to reinstate certain global features. One of her ideas was to offset lines that she thought completed other lines. We begin all lines, verse and prose, part or full lines, at the left margin. With a play like this one that mixes verse and prose so frequently, such lineation decisions are arbitrary at best. Paul Bertram, in his wonderful book (White spaces in Shakespeare: the development of the modern text, 1981), dealt off-setting so-called verse lines a blow that should have killed it. Anyway, it was an innovation by an editor named Steevens in 1793, who was simply trying to do something different from other editions, including his own. Well, you see I can fill up many lines of text by riding my favorite hobby horse.

From the Shakespeare Association of America Newsletter, I got the information that one of the members is leading a seminar on Q1 Hamlet at next spring's meeting. I immediately got in touch with him (wonders of SAA email lists) and told him about the work of our website on Q1. So now we have a back and forth communication going. Shakespeare continues to enliven my days.

Sylvia, my cousin from Brooklyn, came to visit on Wed. afternoon, and she and I took the Sycamore walk along Tappen Beach, a favorite haunt for dog walkers, runners, walkers, etc.—but not too many. The tide was ridiculously low, just the opposite of the day before when Sonia and I took the same walk just at the right time to catch a high tide, higher because of the full moon. She was amazed at the difference from the usual levels. I love seeing things through her eyes.

Sylvia is one of my favorite people, so it is a pleasure to have a peaceful hour or two with her. In another week she will come with three of her grandchildren, Ari and Monicas's children. Maybe Ari will come too. This whole family is very dear to me. But that will certainly be a less peaceful time.

Merwin, as you may recall, completed his radiation therapy on Wed., and is counting the hours for his energy to return. He now has several follow-up visits to see how it worked out. We both are cheerful and hopeful.

My triple dose of HU seems to be helping: no more pain from the spleen. I can work on either computer with no discomfort. Unfortunately, I missed Dr. K's call yesterday (we were out briefly to pick up some things Dave couldn't get), and she did not say what I should do. For the time being, I am staying on the triple dose.

We will be leaving for NYC soon, where we will be this weekend. I'll have more to write about when I return!

Love to all,
Bernice

This is the lunch scene at Thyme, a nice restaurant in Roslyn, a community about 5 miles from us. We haven't been there for a while, and I was surprised that it was mobbed. Fortunately, we had made a reservation. Every table was taken, with overflow on the narrow outdoor balcony. Pam, a friend who lives in Woodbridge; Sandy, our lovely daughter-in-law; Harvey, our oldest son; Merwin; me (am I really that tiny? Probably the camera angle, right?}, and Laura, our oldest grandchild, now near the end of a PhD in organic chemistry (a field my father studied for his M.S.).

Dear friends and family,

Busy eventful days. Sonia came on Friday because the Writing Group came on Thursday, and we went for a long walk, the whole Sycamore walk, which I haven't been able to do. She and I also prepared a lot of foods for final prep as needed. This is a big help for me.

On Saturday, Dawn visited with her friend Arvan (sp?), a student of medieval literature who has snagged a job at Yale. This will be a wonderful stepping stone to the rest of his career. He is a Vegan, so all I had to offer him was my gazpacho, salad and fruit. The rest of us had those things plus a delicious casserole of noodles, cheese, green beans, and cherry tomatoes. I think I did pretty well since though I knew they were visiting, I didn't know they would be having a meal with us.

Arvan is clearly the kind of person that people immediately like and want to help. He has garnered an impressive list of mentors. I enjoyed telling stories about my career as a medievalist. We tried to tempt Arvan to take my medieval books, but only three or four appealed to him: he already has a great supply. He is writing about Piers Plowman, which is one of the works I was interested in writing about when I was a medievalist. When he settles in New Haven, Dawn will introduce him to Harvey and Sandy, who are always so welcoming to young scholars.

Later that same day we had a surprise visit from Lincoln; he called to arrange to come but didn't show up until after 7 p.m. I think. We had tomato, vegetarian bacon and lettuce sandwiches. Do you think I am rather food crazy? It seems to be the most important topic on my mind, food and the people we share it with. I had to go to bed right after the meal, and Lincoln cleaned up the table and swept the floor. What a help that is to both of us.

Merwin's fatigue continues apace, but his last radiation treatment will end on Wed. We're looking forward to that.

On Sunday, the group in the photo at the top arrived a little after 10:00 a.m. Pam had never been to our house before, and we love showing people around. Harvey and Sandy took us all out for a very enjoyable lunch, full of stories and talk, political and otherwise. Later as we were sitting in my study, Laura turned to me and asked how I stayed so happy, smiling and bubbly. It is a gift from my mother: both my sister and I shared her upbeat personality: “What me worry?” I don't think about it, but it was sweet to be asked about it by Laura, but also sad that she said she wasn't like that. She always looks calm and cheerful, so I am not sure she is right about herself. She certainly is caring. She was thoughtful enough to pack up two quarts of the frozen yogurt that I love, made only in a store near her in Boston. Yum. Sweet (but not very) and sour. She backpacked that on the train from Boston to New Haven, then from there by car to my grateful hands. And she makes me the most delightful earrings. What a sweetheart! Not just with me, but in general.

There was little time over the weekend for work on the Measure for Measure copy-edited draft. Disappointingly, I have many corrections to suggest. So it's slow going. It doesn't help that instead of working in the evening, we have gotten into the habit of watching movies. Last night it was My Name is Khan. Do you know it? We liked it. We know high functioning Asperger's people in our family, so it was good to see a full, though fictional depiction.

Now I should return to work. Though I don't mean to "should" on myself: I want to return.

Love to all,
Bernice

Daily events

Merwin is getting better and better with his camera. The top photo shows our volunteer Korean dogwood, a very nice kind of dogwood because it blooms later than the usual kind. We had a Korean dogwood in this same spot, but it had to be cut down after developing an incurable scale. But it left us with this volunteer. This tree is visible from my recliner and also from the kitchen and my study. The bottom photo is a closeup of the delightful blossoms. I like the lesson of the tree: death, yes, but then renewal in offspring.

Dear Friends and Family,

Again it has been some days since I have written. It's all the usual. On the health front, Dr. K had doubled my Hydrea, and just yesterday, looking at my bloods, she tripled the dose. This is 1500 mg twice a day just until my next blood results. I am fortunate in that I have not had the negative effects from this chemo that many people have. I have been feeling better, less lethargic, less pain, so the Hydrea is helping.

Highlights: Laury came over and we spent some time on the copy-edited version of our Measure for Measure. I read her interview of Arin Arbus, the artistic director of Theatre for a New Audience, and thought it was quite wonderful. Of course, I wish I could have been the one to conduct the interview, as I had planned, but since I could not, I am appreciative that Laury and I have a wonderful collaboration, we are almost like each other's second self as far as Shakespeare is concerned, as well as good friends otherwise.

The best part of the week so far was the writing group meeting here. Starting at 10:00 a.m. worked well for us. We chatted, discussing terrible developments at NCC. While Toby, Kathryn and I have retired, me since 1999, we all all interested and connected. The newish President arbitrarily fired temp employees. These decisions are usually initiated by departments, so the English department lost several people they wanted to keep. The anti-union movement has reached our college. So at the same time that Pres. Obama extols the role of community colleges, the funding is just not there. NCC gets supposedly 1/3 from the state, 1/3 from the county and 1/3 from students. The state and the county have dropped the ball. Anyway, we all read wonderful and diverse pieces. I read my opening for the chapter on Macbeth in performance that I am writing with Laury for Continuum Press, and got lots of positive gasps and wide eyes. I begin with the Astor Place Riots, 1849. Now the really hard work, choosing from among the hundreds of Macbeth performances on stage and screen the exemplary few that tell the story.

After our reading, we went (all but Joe who drove me there) to Kiraku, which has become my favorite restaurant, and had a convivial, joyous time. We decided on our next two meetings, at least one at my house again. This is easier for me.

My dear friend and colleague Nick met at MIT with Pete and the programmers there, and all went swimmingly. I don't know the details, but our sites will merge in some way. I feel that hamletworks.org will be safe under the roof of MIT. Next Nick goes to Prague (I had been scheduled to go too) and will present our site there. All these developments make me smile.

Loads of love to all,
Bernice

Eventful Weekend

This is a corner of the 30' x 30' room in Vaughan's Pasadena house, showing one of her husband's paintings. This was a guest room when Merwin and I visited. What a time that was! with mini skirts and Cal Arts going wild with creativity. Merwin and I watched a movie about Pixar that brought it all back.

Dear Friends and Family,

We had a good weekend. Having decided that it would have been too hard for me go to Sandy's for the memorial celebration of Phyllis's life, Merwin and I took advantage of the "free" day to go to our city apartment so we would be there for the concert on Sunday. Merwin asked our building's porter to install our window air conditioner, which he did very well, so we could be cool.

We trained in from Port Washington and took a cab from Penn Station to our apartment, where we found Harvey waiting for us. I had to ask the cab driver to give me a boost up to the rather high seat, and he did it kindly, hands on tush. With Harvey, we explored two restaurants we hadn't tried yet, for lunch Sarabeth's at Lord and Taylor, which is around the corner from us. I also wanted to buy a nice long-lasting lipstick, which I did. And Harvey took off for Fendi, to see if they still had the perfume I have been using for years, since he first bought it for me for a birthday. Merwin and I rested until Harvey returned some hours later. Then he rested while we read. Eventually we went to supper at a restaurant in a hotel on the corner of 5th and 41st. It had gotten a good review from the NYT, but I found it a little bleak (as the Times reviewer had observed) and my salad OK but nothing special. We're going to try it for brunch when the Starks come for a visit in a few weeks. After dinner, it was back to read and rest.

The next day, we gathered clothes for the wash. I used to do this chore myself, but now Merwin had to do the wash while I rested. We went to a local 24/7 shop for breakfast: very nice for what it is. The counterman would make anything you want from a large array of choices. I had scrambled egg with spinach and tomato. We ate at a counter facing 40th Street, and noted the police cars traveling both ways on this one-way street. This meal filled us for the rest of the day! Merwin went to Jack's dollar store across the street while I waited at the counter, drinking my coffee. I am happy to say that business at this modest places was pretty brisk.

We took the bus to Lincoln Center: a little less convenient now since the transit authority has changed the schedule somewhat: the bus no longer swings around to stop in front of Lincoln Center. We had to walk across the streets (Columbus and Broadway). The problem with getting there actually was that because of closing of side streets and huge traffic jams the bus crept along. There were it seems multiple parades. We didn't get to the Hall as early as we thought we would, but early enough. The program featured Anne-Sophie Mutter, violin, and Lambert Orkis, piano, playing Sonatas by Debussy, Brahms, and Mendelssohn, and Concert Fantasia on Carmen, Op. 25, by Sarasate, a phenomenal violinist of the 19th-century. Mutter was kind enough to offer an encore, then another, and then another, and yet another! We were late for the train we wanted to get, so we left during the fourth encore. She just didn't want to stop! Amazing. The crowd loved her. This is our second last concert at the Philharmonic, sadly. We gave up our subscription; it's just getting too hard for me. My exercises with getting up from a seated position are helping though: I managed to rise each time without help.

We got to the LIRR just in time to miss a train, so we decided to wile away the hour with a slice of pizza each. I came home exhausted, but it's all worth it.

This morning I heard from the ShSur editor: no more to do: hooray. And from the SQ editor: I can if I wish go over the edits I suggested to make sure all is well. I'll do that.

I have given up my access to the Allan Room at the NYPL. I can't manage it. I didn't have the energy this time to take care of it but will definitely turn in my key after I pick up the personal stuff I left on my shelf. And so it goes; I have to relinquish some things and look around for other closer things to engage me: my computer work, the flowers outside my window, the view from our little apartment. And friends and family, of course.

Loads of love to all,
Bernice

A downturn

Three views of our pond irises; like many flowers their display is splendid though brief. Unfortunately, something is wrong with the pond's balance, something that has never happened before, and the fish are dying.

Dear Friends and Family,

A week on a higher dose of Hydrea seems to have reduced my white blood count a bit while not reducing the platelets alarmingly, but though my spleen might be very slightly smaller, I still have the symptoms of last week, pain (Tylenol is sufficient), fatigue and more: no need to go into the whole ugly picture. But, and of course I always have a but, I sent off my final (I hope) corrections of the SQ essay, and the very kind editor of ShSur (a friend) will respond to my queries about my proof sheets for that journal when he receives the proofs: he hadn't seen them yet. And Laury dropped off the ms. of our Measure for Measure edition, with the copy-editor's suggestions. All this at once! I have started through this, but am going very slowly. Perhaps Laury and I work on this together. Lots of work to do! To say nothing of hamletworks.org. I have returned to my surveys of TLS, which Kathryn kindly passes on to me. When I find something useful for us, I mark up the copy and put it on my "to do" pile. Step one of several.

Sonia has been a great help this week, as always. I know I feel better when she is with me, and our work together (exercise routine, walking, kitchen chores, laundry) pushes me to accomplish something, anything. Since she left today at 12:30 and after I ate an ample lunch (nothing wrong with my appetite, though my stomach groans because of the spleen's impingement), I have been lying down. It's a little hard to sit at the computer, darn it.

David went shopping for us on Tuesday evening, so yesterday I started to use what he bought, I made gazpacho soup and pesto sauce, two simple recipes, but by the time I was finished I was so tired I was ready to cry. Still, the soup is very good and so is the sauce, and I forgot the fatigue I experienced in the making when I ate them today. Merwin is feeling a little delicate and needs less spicy, more comfort-type food.

Here is my pesto recipe:

In blender or processor, place
2 cups washed and cut up fresh basil leaves
1/3 C pine nuts (pignoli)
1/2 C (or less) good olive oil
1 medium garlic, minced
1/2 C grated Parmeson-Reggiano or Romano cheese

Pulse until well blended. Serve as sauce over noodles, zucchini, or any suitable vegetable. Store in jar in refrigerator for several days.

And here is my recipe for gazpacho:

In blender or processor (I did not clean my blender completely so that some of the pesto flavored the gazpacho), process until fairly smooth:

1 piece of onion
1 clove or more of garlic
I/4 C vinegar
1/4 C olive oil (or less)
1 large cucumber cut into chunks
1 large green pepper cut into chunks

When fairly well blended, add 1 large can of tomatoes. It doesn't pay to use fresh tomatoes in this season.

A little basil doesn't hurt.

Chill and serve cold. I make toppings for the soup: chopped cucumber, scallion, radishes, or whatever else is handy. Croutons work too. Serve along with bowls of soup for people to add at will for a bit of crunch.

You can see how easy these two recipes are, and they should not have wiped me out. But "should" is not operative any more.

Sonia and I enjoyed our walk today; we went all the way around a rather steep hill (for me) to drop off a container that Florence had brought to us filled will her delicious rhubarb compote. When Florence invited us in for a minute, I quickly agreed because I wanted Sonia to see this lovely unit in a condo. Florence offered me a ride to First Friday, our lunch date every month, and I readily agreed, though I can't really tell till I get up tomorrow whether I can go or not.

Back to Shakespeare for a little while, then to bed again.

Love to all,
Bernice