Slow but Steady

Good Evening All,

There is perceptible progress on the Bernice health front. As mentioned before, the discolorations on her legs have largely faded and are now almost gone. The ankle and foot swelling persists but the associated pain is much less. Just days ago when Ronnie, the Visiting Nurse, asked Bernice to gauge the ankle and foot pain, Bernice rated it a 9 or 10, especially when stepping out the first thing in the morning. The reply to the same quarry today was a 2 or 3. Bernice considers this pain and foot discomfort the biggest impediment to her progress in getting well again. There were other good signs. With some help from Ronnie and me, Bernice got down the four stairs to the main house level and she was happy wheeling herself around in her rollator. Thanks Elaine for the use of your handy rollator. We have one for each level. Bernice got to her big computer in her study, read some email, and managed to get out a few messages. She spent some time on the couch there, but does not yet have the strength and endurance for a prolonged visit. Bill, her PT guy came later in the day and is encouraging her to be up and about as much as possible. She also has an exercise program he has directed. All this, of course, is aimed at getting her back into physical shape. I suppose that the reason for this leg business will remain a mystery and we hope there is no recurrence.

Yesterday, we had a rare treat when granddaughter Rachael came and spent part of the day. At 25, Rachael is already an experienced camera person who free-lances, mostly in the TV industry. For the past two years she has worked steadily and this week happened to be the very first instance when she was not at a job (not counting her few time offs) so we were fortunate to have her company. One of her TV shows who alternated seasons between NY and LA decided to move permanently to LA and this gave her the time off. Among other things, directed by her baba Bernice, Rachael made cheese pancakes. Too bad I can't emulate Bernice's tradition of giving out the recipe but I can say these are fluffy and delicious pancakes which I love to have with jam and sour cream and they are made with eggs and flour or matzah meal. Not finding the latter ingredients, Rachael and I went shopping. While Rachael was at the kitchen sink cleaning up we noticed some water on the floor and soon saw that something was leaking from the pipes. Another water incident? unbelievable. I immediately called jack-of-all-trades son Dave who came over and discovered that the pipe from the kitchen drain pipe was perforated and about to fall apart at two of its leaking joints. He disconnected the whole assembly which had couple of interesting bends. He bought new copper pipe (the best he said) and with his tools fashioned a complete replacement which he installed today. It is nice having talented sons and faster and, in this case, cheaper, than depending on hiring plumbers. Dave is multi-talented for Bernice saw an interesting recipe for cheese biscotti in the NY Times Dining section today. She evidently discussed this with Dave for, late in the day, he presented his mom with freshly baked biscotti.

Dimary, the home health aide came today and helped Bernice bathe, straightened the room and helped Bernice count and stick to her exercises. She also helped me to make an inventory of our upstairs freezer. Under the best of circumstances I have always depended on Bernice to know what and where items were in our freezer and the recent inflow from friends and relatives have packed the freezer to create for me a mystery realm. Now I have a written inventory and can consult with Bernice on choices to be made. I plan to repeat this process with the downstairs freezer when Sonia, our TTh aide comes tomorrow. Ironically, emptying the freezer revealed the presence of a half bag of flour, and two boxes of matzah meal, one whole wheat and the other regular. Who knew?

The signs of fall are becoming undeniable despite the reluctance of the daytime temperatures to fully acknowledge the transition. The dogwoods in our neighborhood are responding to the ancient signals but there are considerable differences in their individual inclinations. A few are already garbed in a deep russet, others are in the middle of their seasonal alteration, and a few holdouts are clinging to their greenery for a last fling before succumbing to the inevitable. One of ours, the younger one, still sports most of its green while the elder, located in clear view outside Bernice's study window, is now wearing its initial russet coat. This tree also has an abundance of its red berries which form a fetching contrast to the changed leaf color. I am keeping an eye on this tree and hope i do not miss the exciting and dramatic display of feeding robins. This is the time that our robins are preparing for their annual migration of thousands of miles and they must stock up on rich reserves. I have witnessed the scene a number of times over the years. Somehow, on a particular day the word must go out to the robin community and I have seen a hundred birds or so engage in a wild eating frenzy and completely consume almost everyone of the bright red berries offered by the dogwood. This is an exquisite evolutionary timing of great advantage to each species: the birds are fortified by a rich food source for their coming journey and the tree, working all summer for this day, will have its seeds spread widely and be in a casing of nourishing bird droppings. Other dramas were also visible in our yard today. We have tall stands of buddlia (butterfly bushes) at the rear of the yard and, as their name implies, these attract many butterflies during the season, my favorite being the bright yellow-winged Tiger Swallowtails but at the equinox the most prominent butterfly is the Monarch. These amazing butterflies migrate in the waning warm days for thousands of miles to certain (no longer secret) forested mountain havens deep in Mexico. The buddlia provide precious fuel for their long journey. My tomato crop is almost all gathered. I plant only six plants and this year chose six different varieties: cherry and grape (big production) and four modest producers - beefsteak, early girl, big boy and la Roma. These six are all finished but there was another unplanned tomato plant. It is what Uncle Henry from Buffalo called a volunteer and it sprouted on its own right in the flower bed and next to my purple clematis vine. I saw it there in the spring and wondered how it was seeded some 40 feet from where I grow tomatoes each season. I almost pulled this misplaced aggressor out but curiosity prevailed. I caged the regular crop but did nothing but look occasionally at this curiosity. And what do you know? This plant has proved to be a huge success out producing all the others. I picked four good-sized and delicious fruits from its sprawling vines today and there are many green and partly red tomatoes remaining.

I am leaving Bernice and getting back to my water aerobics program at the JCC on MWF mornings and I received warm greetings from my pool mates when i returned. I saw friend Elaine as she was leaving and I was entering at 8:30 this morning. Many there ask about Bernice. Her fellow spinners have sent her greetings and encourage her quick recovery so she can join them again in their vigorous hour-long classes. Alle Vey (it should be so).

Good night,
Merwin

Back Again

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Hi All,

Your blog writer has returned. There have been emails and phone calls wondering where the blog is and if something happened. No real problems I am happy to report but now I am faced with having to recall events over a span of days instead of mere hours.

The picture is hot off the email press and the occasion is our dear daughter-in-law Sandy's Birthday. There she is with loving son Harvey at a posh restaurant in New Haven. These are two extremely busy people and I am pleased to see they found a common chink in their schedules to celebrate. Sandy just returned from a week in Quebec for a favorite conference of hers. In addition to being an elected Selectman in her community she is the clinical and business administrator of the radiology department at the Yale New Haven University Hospital. We love her. Harvey was here this past weekend and helped out in multiple areas. He and son Dave extended our wifi coverage in the house to more strongly reach the bedroom and sitting room area where Bernice is spending virtually all her time. Her old laptop there has been replaced and she has made a couple of forays to a new laptop. As her legs and feet grow stronger and the pain there subsides she looks forward to getting back to work on the computer.

The black&blue blotches on Bernice's legs have largely faded but her lower legs and ankles were painfully swollen. On Monday, Ronnie the Visiting Nurse who is here MWF was so concerned about the left swollen foot that she called Dr. G our primary care doctor. There was fear of a blood clot. Dr. G said to get to the office ASAP. Bernice was determined to make the trip on our own without getting the ambulette transport. With son Dave's help Bernice got down the two sets of four steps and into the cushioned seat of our car. Dr. G had arranged things so there was very little waiting once we arrived. Bernice was put in a wheel chair and first had a venous doppler sonogram test. Dr.G told us there was no indication of a clot, noted the reduction in the black&blue areas, and observed the swollen feet and their sensitivity to touch especially on the left side. His speculation on what may have happened is that somehow a bleed originated in the area of the pelvic break that occurred in March and the blood moved downward in the legs. The break was on her left side and that is where the problem was worse. Apparently, this blood flow has stopped. So, we have regained a degree of independence as far as travel outside our home.

The health and care routine is now satisfactorily organized for Bernice. Dimary who was here yesterday and comes MWF helped Bernice shower and dress before we went to the doctor yesterday. Dimary is part of the Visiting Nurse service all under the very welcome medicare program. Today, Sonia was here and will be coming every TTh as long as we need her. She helped Bernice with her now daily shower and did organizing in the kitchen. With her new knowledge of how to make spinach pancakes she supplied her family with this new dish and they all loved it. Today she made steel cut Irish oatmeal, a dish Bernice loves but which requires a slow simmer of 40 minutes to prepare. Bernice has hers with a pat of butter and ground pepper. On the rare occasions when i have this dish I put i more butter, brown sugar or maple syrup and a good quantity of half-and-half.

Until the next post,
Merwin

Sammy's Day

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That is Bernice's dog Sammy in the picture. More of that later.

Things may be looking up. Before I go into to detail I must say that Bernice has accused me of occasional sugar-coating in my role as substitute blog writer. I tell her that I try to call it as I see it. So, be forewarned. The black& blue discolorations are fading but are not gone. Her ankles and lower legs are swollen and are painful but my impression is that the pain is less. Her doctors remain uncertain as to the cause but it is probably related to her underlying blood condition. A trip to the doctor is a major operation at this time and would involve hiring an ambulette again. Dr M, the main doctor involved in her care, seems willing to wait and see.

In the time being the situation with Home Health Aides appears to nicely resolved. Sonia, who I mentioned before, was here on Tuesday and Thursday. A very competent and willing worker who gave Bernice a shower, put all her linens in the wash, and generally straightened things out. Bernice instructed her in the making of spinach pancakes. Sonia is married to a Chinese man who does the major cooking in their house but she did a good job and we all enjoyed the dish. I can only say that the ingredients are limited to fresh spinach and eggs mixed together and added to a hot frying pan coated with some olive oil. I have never made this but have feasted on these delicious pancakes for decades. The family story is that when Bernice's older sister, Mildred, was a child a knowing doctor, to induce her to eat spinach, gave the recipe to Bernice's mother and this preparation has been a family favorite ever since. The present plan is have Sonia here every Tuesday and Thursday. She is sure to acquire more culinary instruction from Bernice.

With Yolanda gone we had new aide from the Visiting Nurse Service and she is a gem. The nurse was here on Yolanda's last day and agreed with us that it was just not worth having her here. I do feel sorry for this woman who certainly tries and I wish her luck and I hope she can find work elsewhere. Our nurse was instrumental in getting our new aide Dimary assigned here. She was here two hours today and gave Bernice a sponge bath and rearranged Bernice's drawers while Bernice instructed. Bernice decided to bag most of those colorful Bernice-signature stockings to make room in one of her drawers. Dimary, a young woman who happens to be attending Nassau Community College with hopes of becoming a nurse, was fascinated by these cool stockings. Bernice had her pick out a few to keep. At one point, Bernice sent me out to get some nail polish and Dimary gave Bernice a spirit-lifting manicure.

The presence of the aides are a blessing to Bernice and they certainly make things easier for me.

Now, about Sammy the dog. Bill the physical therapist returned yesterday and helped Bernice down the four steps to the main level of our home and Bernice, with her rollator, was greatly brightened by touring all the rooms. She needed Bill's help to get back up the stairs as her legs are not yet strong enough. He has given her exercises aimed at reducing the leg and ankle swelling and to strengthen everything. Sammy stands stoically in our front vestibule and greets guests as they enter our front door. Some visitors are momentarily taken back but soon see that Sammy is quite harmless and many give him a friendly pat. As Bill was leaving yesterday he told me that there was water on the tiles of the front vestibule near where Sammy was guarding our entrance. I knew I could trust Sammy for he is as throughly house broken as any dog can be, but I was greatly concerned about the source of the water. The ceiling was dry and a quick inspection under the large credenza offered mo immediate clue. There is a radiator located at the front wall and I had horrible visions of what a radiator leak might mean. But, why on a hot summer day? I found the culprit and was puzzled but greatly relieved. In the corner, hidden by the large credenza I had a half bag of Snow Melt crystals (not salt) which I last used to spread on ice on our front steps. Evidently these crystals had absorbed water to such an extent that they were now giving off the excess which had puddled onto the floor. I will have to ask our chemist granddaughter Laura for an explanation. Sammy, I suppose saw all this develop but was his usual silent self.

good night all,
Merwin

Ups and Downs

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Good Morning Everyone,

Here is a happy scene from last night and there is much to notice here. Bernice is very content and happy with her new up-to-date hair style. Steven, the barber came in the afternoon with all his tools and quickly collected the shorn hair in his barber sheet. Steven and his fraternal twin operate their barber shop in our little town of Glen Head. He and his family came to this country from Uzbekistan when he was 15. They were Jews living in a largely Muslim part of the Soviet Union at that time. He absolutely refused to take any payment (this is a mitzvah!) but was very grateful when Bernice gave him a copy of her father's book in which he describes in lyric detail his life in the Ukraine until he was about 17.

Pictured are half of Bernice's writing group: from left to right, Hedda, Jay, Meta, and Barbara. They came at 6:00 and brought the makings of a splendid dinner: a shrimp pasta dish, a bountiful salad with fresh ingredients from Barbara's garden, wine, breads, cheeses, side dishes, and desserts. We assembled in the dining room within earshot of Bernice who was enjoying the feast in her bedroom recliner chair. The group has been together since about 1982 and they meet monthly and read aloud their stories, essays, and poetry. An outsider, I have never been in one of their gatherings but I know that they all love the mutual support, supportive criticism, and abundant love and friendship provided in their monthly meetings. Early on the group was all young faculty in the English department and now all are active professors with two retirees including Bernice but all are deeply involved in their own writing.

Notice also, Bernice's hospital bed which allows her to separately elevate her head and feet. She is so much more comfortable here in her own bedroom and does not even want to contemplate a revisit to any hospital. The ups and downs mentioned in today's title refer to the unpredictability of things. Bernice was feeling quite good yesterday, especially through the evening when her dear friends were here. The black&blue splotches in her legs have continued to slowly fade but the night was not good. Her ankles and lower legs are more swollen and her left ankle especially was terribly painful during the night. Not being a doctor (they are also uncertain in this case) I can only speculate. There has been a downward movement of the sub-surface blood accompanied by the fading patches but all this fluid has now reached the ankles and feet with painful consequences. Hopefully, it will be absorbed and the pain relieved.

Right now, Sonia the home health aide is here for her second day and this seems to be a success. She has put in a wash and is helping to bathe Bernice. No doctor plans yet today. Dr M in his emails advises a brief wait and see.

A few blog readers, according to emails, are under the misapprehension that it is dear Bernice who continues to author this blog. If the context is not enough of a hint then my engineer's writing style compared with Bernice's fluid prose should have been evidence enough.

Bye for a time,
Merwin

A Ray of Light?

Good morning all,

We have had a busy few days. The MRI results came in and showed nothing at all abnormal so the cause of the extensive black&blue blotches on Bernice's legs remains a medical mystery. The most distressing component has been an excruciating ankle pain that developed about two days ago when she first stood from her bed or chair. There was good news this morning for this pain seems to have abated. To paraphrase one of Bernice's favorite guys: one day without that pain does not a cure make. More encouraging is that the discoloration has faded somewhat and has moved downward. Harvey says this collected sub-skin blood would tend to move downward. Both he and Dr. M recommend to keep walking, keep feet elevated when in bed, and exercise the legs and feet even when in bed. If you know bernice, you can depend on her faithfully following such directions. She is doing a great deal of walking in the limited space of our bedroom and sitting room area. Until things settle down and she gets the doctor's OK the PT work has been suspended.

We had plans to try and get in and see her long-time hematologist Dr. K today but have now found this is her day off. This was a stop-gap we decided with Dr. M who recognized that a trip to Mt Sinai in NY City would be too arduous. I have hopes that this latest assault on her legs and sensibilities will fade away and she can continue to heal. She is dividing her time reading the NY Times, listening to some classical music, but with a special enthusiasm is working on the manuscript for Measure for Measure. This puts a big smile on her face and a glow in cheeks.

Yesterday Bernice suggested that she does not approve of her half-shaved head. A fuzz has sprouted where the neurosurgeon had to shave her skull and the rest sports her familiar and much-loved hair style. She wants to even things up and shave the other half — or at least level the playing field as they say. I was reluctant in my approval but Bernice almost always wins me over. Our neighbors Mel and Viv asked a local barber named Steve if he would come over to our house and perform this special shaping. Steve, a Russian-Jew said it would be a Mitzvah (a special blessing.) I will report later on the result.

On another front concerning a Home Health Aide, we may have an arrangement. As part of the medicare sponsored Visiting Nurse Service we are entitled to such help and we experienced the "help" of Yolanda for two visits. She was willing in her way but was very slow, quite dim, and neither Bernice nor I thought it was at all worth the trouble. In the time being, on the recommendation of Jane our agent for a Long Term Care policy we have, we had Sonia in yesterday. Based on this one visit we may be in luck. More on this as the situation develops.

Bernice and I composed a long shopping list and i am off to do this in moments.

Enjoy the day,
Merwin

Eventful Weekend

Hello all,

On Monday we may get the results of Friday's MRIs and we shall see if they show nothing wrong. This will support Bernice's speculation that the continued pressure of the bed rail as she left and entered the hospital bed, was the cause of the bad bruising in her thighs. Hard to tell at this point if there is much improvement but things are not worse.

Friend Laury arranged to have Margarita come to spend some time cleaning our house. Margarita is one of three sisters and her sister Pilar works for Laury cleaning her house. Sunday morning is a convenient time for Margarita and is fine with us. She has two girls, 5 and 10, whom one of the sisters can watch. Margarita is a whirlwind at cleaning: she is fast and got to places to clean that we believe may not have been touched for years. We are all for having her come every Sunday. We have a cleaning service who come in every three or four weeks with three people who stay for two hours. Margarita wins this competition hands and mop down.

Laury herself also came and spent time with Bernice on their Shakespeare work. This is notable for it is the first time that Bernice is spending time on her work. Bernice and Laury already co-edited a Romeo and Juliet publication for Focus Publications intended for high school and early college students. They are in the process of editing another Shakespeare play, Measure for Measure, and this work may be about 80% complete. It is a joy for me to see Bernice working with the printed manuscript pages. She is not quite up to spending much time with a laptop but admits to feeling more alive and happy with this start. While they were working on Shakespeare I loaded Laury's little iPod with Beethoven and Haydn until it was filled to capacity.

There were the usual calls from our sons getting mom's news and telling us of their activities. In the afternoon cousin Sylvia came from Brooklyn bearing exotic foodstuffs from that remote outpost. For Bernice's vegetarian tastes there was chummas, smoked trout, and taboulleh salad and for me she brought tasty corned beef and chocolate flaky rugelach. In addition there were frozen foods she had prepared, packaged, and labeled. She and I had to struggle to fit all this food into our two little freezers. I intend to take an inventory tomorrow for I will never remember the details of this abundance. A few months ago my dear Bernice insisted, for reasons of economy and her common sense, that I disconnect our large upright freezer which has served us for decades and was still operating. It now stands forlorn in the basement, with no mission, and not wanted by anyone I have contacted. My, could it hold tons of food.

Have a great week everyone!
love, Merwin

Another Adventure

Dear All,

Sorry for my absence of a few days but i will try to to give an efficient summary. We were occupied with another not-needed distraction which (I will say at the start) I believe has been favorably resolved. If you are tired of hearing more medical stories, skip this paragraph. A couple of days ago Bernice complained of pain in her left thigh and when we looked there was huge black and blue area extending the full length of the thigh and half its width. With Bernice's condition we and the doctor's must be alert to changes of condition, especially to something which pains. We called DR. m and described the situation on the phone. Difficult to make a judgment by phone. Any chance of a picture? he quarried. He knows I am technologically prepared but it was son Dave who took three pictures and i emailed these in. Minutes later Dr. M, along with his team, viewed the pictures and asked more questions. Bernice bruises very easily and always sports a set black and blue marks and this appeared to be a spread of blood under the skin surface. He wanted her to see a doctor locally since the trip into NYC did not seem feasible. We were able to get squeezed into an appointment in the office of our primary care giver and Dr. C recommended that Bernice get MRIs of the pelvic and lower abdomen areas to rule out the possibility that there is a leaking blood source above the crotch. In order to transport Bernice, who has been confined to her bedroom area for the week since her release from the hospital, we had to hire a special ambulate company. They got her into a wheel chair and into their van which has a lift gadget at its rear. We were picked up yesterday morning at 6:45 and Bernice was the first patient. In spite of this there was no diagnosis — the doctors left early for the Jewish holiday - and we must await Monday. This morning Bernice complained of pain in her other thigh and when we looked, there was the telltale black and blue discoloration. Bernice now had an idea as to cause. She is sleeping and resting in a hospital bed and there are metal side rails. The back rail is raised but she does not use that side. The other rail is lowered to its full extent but the top bar is just about (or a bit higher) than the level of the mattress. When she leaves and enters the bed and she is in a sitting position, this top bar presses firmly into her upper thigh. Since the left leg has been stiff and hurt, she has favored the right leg and she speculates that this is why this thigh may have succumbed to the same injury. Bernice bruises easily due to her blood condition and the bruises are long-lasting. I have now removed that side bar from the bed. I expect a negative diagnosis from the MRI readings (I hope so) and feel a good level of confidence that Bernice is right.

On other fronts. A home health aide from the Visiting Nurse Service started yesterday. Her name is Yolanda and we hope she will work out. She travels by bus and i pick her up about a half mile away. She helped Bernice shower and wash her hair, changed all the linen and put in a wash. Yolanda is rather slow and not overly bright and actually got lost in finding Bernice's room after going to the laundry room. We shall see. The visiting nurse also came to pay a visit.

Our nearby neighbor, Vivian, sent over a lovely dinner for me — not vegetarian! Lincoln came by for a visit. We did little to observe Yom Kippur and did not even consider a fast.

love to all, Merwin

Viral Victories

Hello Everyone,

No, no I am not referring to those first-thought-of computer viruses concocted by malicious crazies who have given good computer people a bad name, but am thinking of the original viruses whose mindless variety are responsible for so much human misery by causing colds. As I mentioned in an earlier blog, a cold was visited on me on the very day after Bernice arrived home and it has now nearly faded away. Unfortunately, poor Bernice who often avoids cold even when i have succumbed, started with a runny nose and cough yesterday and is now contending with this miserable malady. Yesterday she felt poorly enough to postpone her session of PT. One must accept these things but I do feel guilty having visited this additional burden on my dear. Today marks one week that she is home.

In the time being other things are getting organized and it is surprising how long these things take. The Visiting Nurse is coming MWF, Bill the PT person also three times a week, the blood draw once a week, and yesterday i made an arrangement for a cleaning woman to visit once a week. Medicare pays for all but the cleaning. The Visiting Nurse Service is trying to get a home health aid who would help with showering, bed making, laundry, and meal preparation but no luck to this point. The problem is that most of these people do not have cars and Glen Head is remote. I am working on alternates and hope to find someone today. Friend Florence brought some delicious blueberry muffins which we both enjoyed. I am making meals from our store of freezer foods.

Bernice is reading the daily NY Times, the New Yorker, watching all kinds of television but this mental diet is driving her stir crazy. She says that my visits to her when we can just sit and converse are welcome and she misses me during my absences but does understand that I have other things to do. I wonder when I will be able to return to my JCC exercise activity. I suppose we must be patient with the slow process of healing and be thankful that things are on the upswing now.

Looking forward to brighter and inevitable days,
love Merwin

A Morning Blog

Hi All,

I managed to miss writing last night but will fill in on this still wet morning with a promise of later sun. Arthur left early Sunday morning but not before getting all his bedding in the laundry room, performing some general cleaning up, and making his mom some breakfast. At about 9:30, Bill the PT person from Visiting Nurses came to do his evaluation of how much PT Bernice will require. The territory was familiar for Bill very effectively guided Bernice back to better strength after her pelvic fracture last March. He got Bernice, using the hand rails on both sides, to get down the four steps to the main house level but he had to help considerably to get back up the stairs. She also walked with the help of her rollator. Bill will come in three days a week. He gave Bernice a set of exercises she is to do on her own.

Later in the day friend and Shakespeare collaborator Laury visited bringing Bernice news of their shared world and friendly conversation. In the early evening friends Florence and David stopped by with a just-made bread pudding and a lovely Shakespeare adorned coffee mug.

I am finding much to do with figuring out what to make for each of us to eat, keeping the house somewhat neat, and keeping up with all the household tasks. Dave is helping with shopping. There are a number of foodstuffs in the freezer which are a big help.

A young couple, Lorraine and Scott, live directly across the street from us and they are often helpful in many ways. They have two very pretty girls aged 6 and 3 and were expecting a third child but declined finding what the sex might be. I did not mention to them that in the past 40 years in this country, couples who already had two children of the same sex and then had a third child had the same sex about 70% of the time. They beat these odd when Justine, a little bruiser of almost 9 pounds was born last week. Bernice can get occasional pleasurable glimpses of the family through her front window.

Good morning,
Merwin

Family Visitors

My cold has matured and is sapping my strength but not my determination to post, at least, a truncated blog. Arthur arrived last night having left New Hampshire after his work day there. He was very helpful during the day with shopping but mostly with supportive and entertaining conversations with his mom and me. He made us a tasty breakfast of scrambled eggs and cheese. Bernice supplemented this with some yoghurt. It seems that her usually robust appetite has returned and this is a good omen in addition to being a healthy turn of events. A Visiting Nurse stopped by to change a dressing. Strangely, the incision wounds from her brain neurosurgery have healed marvelously but the original scalp wound in the back of her skull has not fully closed and requires a fresh dressing every two days. Bernice is sporting an increasingly thick fuzz of hair where her scalp was shaved. Today she began donning a wrapped and colorful scarf on her head so this fuzz may not be visible to visitors. She has joked about spiking the remaining hair on her right side and maybe coloring it green in the style of those daring teenagers.

A little later in the day Harvey and Sandy along with Murray, Sandy's father, arrived for a nice visit. Sandy helped me explore the refrigerator contents and remove items more than a month old. They also went shopping and set me up with some labeled foodstuffs to put in the freezer. This will enable a husband with no culinary skills to provide some meals for us. We later had dinner of pizza, salad, desserts, all on paper plates and Bernice participated enthusiastically.

Tomorrow morning at 9:30 Bill, the same PT person who helped Bernice with such skill and understanding when she suffered her pelvic fracture, will arrive to perform a PT evaluation.

Bernice is certainly looking and feeling better than she did a week ago and impressed and pleased her two older sons with the progress she has made. That is it for my unusually concise blog for tonight.

love, Merwin

2nd day at home

Hello All,

Here we are in our own little castle in Glen Head. Bernice is so happy to be here and I am sure will thrive and heal with her usual determination. There is much to organize but we have made a good start. On Thursday a Visiting Nurse spent over an hour here doing an evaluation and getting many things going. There will be two hour sessions three times a week with one of their nurses and a weekly blood draw with results going to her hematologist. We will probably put into place additional home care to supplement these services. Bernice use her Rollator (we called it a "wheelie" until corrected by the nurse) to get from bed to bathroom by herself. A PT person will be starting tomorrow and we will get additional PT if this seems warranted. Until she gets a little stronger she is restricting her movements to the bedroom level and not attempting the four steps to the main level. We have another Rollator awaiting her there.

Unfortunately, during our very first night home I developed one of these pesky summer colds. According to my cold log (I have all sorts of logs) my last cold was in June 2009 and Bernice avoided getting that one from me. Let us hope that she can do likewise with this one. If this current report is lacking lucidity it can be blamed on the cold pill I took which do a good job of reducing runny nose but creates a fuzzy and sleepy head.

Lincoln and Dave prepared and served a nice dinner last night. Salmon, fresh corn-on-the-cob, and salad with fresh tomatoes. I was happy that they did all the cleanup also. Friend Louise contributed by having quietly delivered a basket of corn, tomatoes, and apples in an attractive basket. Louise had slipped the basket inside the front door unseen by me. If visits or calls are short Bernice is happy to contact friends.

It is very nice writing the blog and not reporting on new medical oddities but merely the drab business of slow healing and recovery. Again, Happy New Year to all.

love, Merwin

Home at Last

Dear Faithful Bloggers,

You can mark down September 8th as the day Bernice returned home after more than three weeks at Mt. Sinai hospital. She has been gaining in strength daily and, when they finally came at the end of the day, the Rehab doctor judged that Bernice would be better off at home. Actually, with Bernice's strong feelings that she wanted to go home, we had decided the matter early in the day. We consulted with the social service person and made the initial arrangements for home care. At 9:00 in the morning a nurse from the Visiting Nurse Service will be here to do an evaluation and more will get settled.

Dave drove in and Bernice happily sat in her car and enjoyed the trip home. She is now in our new hospital bed which has displaced our big bed in the master bedroom which is now in the adjacent sitting room. That is where I will be sleeping — within a little more than whispering distance.

Happy New year to all; L' Shana Tova

love, Merwin

A good day

Hello All,

We can see the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel and are confident it is not an oncoming train. Monday, Labor Day, was an understandably quiet day with a holding crew of doctors around but, thankfully, a full nursing staff on duty. At one point a young, blonde, good-looking young man came into the room and announced that he was there to remove the staples from Bernice's scalp incisions. I had seen him before as part of Dr. Moyles neurosurgery team but discovered now that he is a fourth year medical student aspiring to become a neurosurgeon. I asked before he began if he had ever done this before. He chuckled and replied that prime activities of medical students are to change dressings and bandages and to remove staples and stitches. I told him I would be watching carefully. He brought out and removed the sterilized wrapping of a specialized tool: a staple remover somewhat different than the version I keep in my desk drawer. Jeffery removed 22 staples from Bernice's two scalp incisions with only a minor level of discomfort for Bernice. Every day Bernice's appetite is improving and the nausea which is evidently a side effect of her brain surgery, is gone. She spends time in her chair or sitting on the side of the bed dangling her legs over and doing leg lifts. We were told that the evaluation people from Rehab would arrive on Tuesday. Who knows?

I arrived at about 9:00 on Friday morning because I did not want to miss the Rehab people. So as to not keep you in suspense, the Rehab crew never appeared and i finally left at about 5:30. At around 2:00 in the afternoon Bernice took a nap and i joined her slouched in a chair. Our Dr. M. visited twice during the day and is very pleased with Bernice's overall progress. He obtained the go-ahead from the powers running the drug trial to start her up again. Some patients on the trial have had dramatically good results but, even though Bernice saw only modest improvements, we all thought it will be worth while. Dr M. is in favor of Bernice getting into Rehab if she qualifies but he can only recommend. Dr Moyle the neurosurgeon also visited and approved of all he saw. He is also in favor of Rehab and will send in his recommendation. We have plans if Rehab in the hospital does not work out and they involve returning to the Glen Head area but nothing will be finalized until we find out.

On two occasions today Bernice circumnavigated her whole area with a walker. The first time was with Chrissy the PT gal who also led Bernice to a stairway where she climbed four stairs. I was the guide on her later second trip. On the Monday just past Bernice will have been in Mt. Sinai for three weeks.

If you keep conversations short Bernice is accepting calls on her cell at 516-435-5060.

Good night all,
love, Merwin

Back in the City

Hello All,

I am back in the city after a night and part of a day in Glen Head where I was able to sort through piles of mail to sift the wheat from the chaff, so to speak. What a burden this growth of junk mail is to everyone concerned: the companies and charities evidently convinced that it has a payoff, the poor mail person who lugs the excess around, the homeowner who must handle it and usually disposes of it, and finally, our already overstressed garbage disposal system. But enough of my day at home and on to Bernice. During my absence from the hospital we were already into the Saturday night of the Labor Day Weekend. Bernice and I spoke many times by phone so I heard her frustration in being unable to get help in a timely manner. A few of the nursing and aide staff did not show up (Doctors were all present) and this staff shortage overworked those present and created annoying delays. Bernice is no longer in the critical care category so an inevitable and understandable triage put her at a disadvantage on Saturday night. One compensation was that her Russian-speaking roommate (who left Bernice some delicious fruit) was discharged so the room was quieter. I am pleased to report that by Sunday the staffing levels had risen to normal and Bernice was more satisfied.

I gathered many things from Glen Head (like my Cheerios cereal that I couldn't buy near the apartment) and Dave drove us in to Mt Sinai. Bernice enjoyed seeing son Dave who also stopped off at the apartment to perform some computer fixes for me. Friend Laury also stopped in to visit Bernice. When Bernice's dinner arrived Bernice deemed it as less than satisfactory. Thoughtful and resourceful Laury asked Bernice what she would like and went out and down the street to a place she knew. She returned with a feast for Bernice: lox, pumpernickel, tomato, and two cheeses. It was a treat for Bernice and for us seeing her eat a good quantity. I felt there was marked improvement today. Bernice is spending a good amount of time sitting at the side of the bed and doing leg exercises. She told me not to overplay the improvement story when blog writing but things do look better to me.

Happy Labor Day all,
Merwin

A room with (an interior) view

Hello faithful bloggers,

Bernice is back in the now familiar hem/onc unit and is very satisfied with her B bed at a broad window. As I mentioned a few blogs ago, this handsome and functional 11-story building was designed by IM Pei and a major feature is that there are atriums extending to the full height of the building with glass roofs. Every patient room has a window facing either to the outside or to an atrium. Bernice's window faces an atrium and offers a view of the internal hallways flanking one side of this impressive space. She can watch the traffic of patients and staff. There is plenty of light and her view creates a feeling of extended openness. She and I are very pleased. Things are looking up medically. With help (they do not want another fall) she walks to the bathroom and moves from her bed to a comfortable chair next to her window. Her appetite has returned but is at a low level. A dietitian talked with her today and offered suggestions. She is supposed to exercise, even when in bed, by doing arm and leg raises. Bernice finds it hard to believe how weak her body is now but all the doctors tell her that her strength will be restored.

At about 6:00 tonight Bernice observed that I was looking tired and should head for the apartment. I agreed and here I am with an earlier blog time. We are probably entering a time of slow recovery and I don't expect any dramatic events to punctuate her return to normalcy. I mentioned back a few blogs ago that there might be another operation to "fix" the poorly healed wound in the back of her head. It turns out that this is a purely superficial fix to prettify the wound site. It will be covered by her hair and she vetoed going ahead with this. There is now a short, curly fuzz growing where her scalp was shaved. All the staff, including doctors from diverse disciplines, comment on how good she looks. Tired of her usual rejoinder she only smiles and gives me a subtle eye roll.

So far Earl has made no appearance in NY city. There are not even any outlying rain bands and so no rain at all. Earl has weakened and is centered hundreds of miles off the coast. There are presently a string of tropical storms, advancing like a line of ducks, following Earl and any of these could mature into a hurricane.

Goodnight all. I may skip a day or two but will be sure to bring notable news.
love, Merwin

A long day for both

Hello All!

For a mix of reasons I finally arose at about 5:30 this morning. Our apartment overlooking Bryant Park has been a godsend (who knows?) but there can be noisy nights from street noise. It was unusually warm so I had our little AC on but there was a great machine pulled into a drive at the park, almost beneath my window, performing some unknown task and accompanied by an inexcusable roar lasting hours in what civilized folk call the dead of night. I looked at my email and checked on the most current info on new friend Earl who had weakened a bit. I was out of cereal so I joined the early morning crowds, got my NY Times, and picked up an egg sandwich and some orange juice.

Bernice was surprised and pleased to see me arrive at about 9:00. Her surgeon, Dr Moyle, had already visited and checked out under her head bandage (looks fine) and asked how she felt. As she replied to that question most of the day she said, Lousy. No back or head pain but nausea continues. I was disappointed that she did not say anything about her fervent desire to have window. A view of Central Park would be an added and super feature. I called her favorite Dr Mascarenhas, hematologist/oncologist, on his cell phone and told him of her bitter disappointment to be in the A bed at the door and not the B bed at a window. I am afraid that I laid it on a bit thick by telling him there were tears in her eyes when she was wheeled in the A position. He agreed that the proper disposition is an important part of a cure and he would see us later. The neurosurgery/neuroscience unit is not his home turf but he would see what can be done. He did stop with two coworkers we know well. He is still adjusting her bloods and mentioned that he is talking to the drug trial people to see if she can resume the trial drug which was stopped when she fell.

A parade of other doctors came to visit. Bernice was given a refreshing sponge bath. The big event was that (to put it delicately) an important bodily function finally resumed after a five day hiatus. This seemed to diminish her nausea and she managed to eat a little.

I left her with her cell phone, her reading glasses, and some sections of the NY Times. This was the first time since the operations that she had any interest in these things. As I sat writing this blog, listening to the master lute music of John Dowland (thanks again, Raymond) my phone rang. Bernice told me she is moving back up to the Hem/Onc unit tonight. She may get her B bed tonight. The populations of patients in each unit is distinctive. The neuro unit has those who just had strokes, head injuries, or brain surgery whereas the hem/onc unit has patients with various cancers or blood disorders. After all, a hospital is rough place — it caters to sick people. We both prefer the nurses and staff in the hem/onc unit and it is the domain of our Dr M who probably arranged this. She will be seen by the neuro people also, of course. Mt Sinai does an excellent job of coordinating all its medical disciplines.

I am sure you will all join me in looking forward to a better day tomorrow.

love, Merwin

Out of ICU

Dear All,

Another day of healing; we all know this process can't be hurried but it can try anyone's patience. When I got to Bernice this morning she was sitting in a recliner chair but still connected to her array of tubes. She had eaten a yogurt but had no stomach for more. Along with other things she is evidently obtaining some nourishment through her IV but, I suppose, as she regains strength she will be weaned from that. She is tired and not happy with this prolonged hospital confinement. I missed the early morning visit of her surgeon who said things were on course and that Bernice looks good. I did get to see our favorite Dr Mascarenhas, her hematologist who admitted her and has overseen her whole hospital. He is adjusting some of her meds to keep her blood values on an even keel. When he also declared that Bernice looks very good Bernice replied that she is blessed and cursed: she has the appearance of looking good even when she is feeling rotten. In the late afternoon she was transferred out of ICU to the 8th floor of the west tower to the neuroscience and neurosurgery unit. A bit of a mixup now occurred for which I have no present explanation. I had her new room assignment and was pleased that she was at a window in a double room and I was told to await her transport there. Before she arrived I was told that she would be in another room, near the door and the room bathroom. Something about a recommendation by the nurse in ICU. I complained and was told not to worry for she would be transferred soon to a window spot. This is important to Bernice. When I left the unit tonight I was told the transfer tonight may not occur because they had a flood of admissions. Such are the added things one is drawn into worrying about. Shortly before I left Bernice was visited by a lively PT woman who cajoled and convinced Bernice to get on her feet and take a few steps. There is a long way to go to strengthen Bernice after all this down time.



Hurricane Earl continues to churn towards the east coast having covered more than 350 miles since last night. Again,, if you are uninterested in the fascinating topic of Hurricanes, skip to the end. Earl has picked up speed over the day from 14 to 18 mph and now is pointing to the NW. One may think of a hurricane as a fighter striding forward and possessing a powerful right punch and a weaker left punch. Last night the maximum wind speed was 135 mph (same tonight) and Earl was advancing at about 15 mph. With these numbers I stated that the ground speed to the right (east) would be 150 mph and to the left(west) 120 mph. The ratio of these two speed is 150/120 = 5/4 = 1.25. 25% more wind speed at the right. Now, it turns out that the force exerted by a particular wind speed goes up as the square of the speed. If the speed doubles the force increases by 4; if the speed triples the force increases by 9. In our case the force would be 56% more at the right. That is a lot more wallop. It still appears that Earl's path will have its weak side skim along the coast while the really powerful winds will be pummeling the Atlantic water well off shore. But, as my son Harvey reminds me, even 100 mph winds can be terribly destructive. (This writing diversion relaxes me)

love to all,

Merwin