Two more days to report

Dear Friends and Family,


Yesterday Michelle went through our collection of art and related books and is enthusiastically interested in adding these to her now meager collection. These things will go back to Woodbridge (her parents' home) and await the time when the sisters get their own apartment which they hope to do in the spring. Michelle showed us a draft of her portfolio, and we were very impressed. It is a beautifully crafted piece of work in itself, and shows off her talents, which are impressive and inventive. Towards the end of the portfolio, she shows the work she enjoys most at the place where she works: There are three major shows for the company's big customers each year and a number of smaller conference and display situations and Michelle is in charge of the designs for three conference rooms. Until we saw pictures of her concept designs (all done on the computer) and photos of the actual rooms, we did not fully appreciate the skill and talent involved. Very impressive.

After she removed the books she wanted, she rearranged (at my request) the cabinet that had contained them. It had been a cluttered mess with pieces of this and that (bowls, vases) on the top and the books jammed in below. Now it looks like a feature instead of a disaster.

Michelle is just as handy in the kitchen as are all the other women in tha family. We had a lovely lunch but were so full two of us didn't want dinner (I am the one who eats most and actually had another meal). In the afternoon, I puttered around making a NYT recipe of roasted garlic, red peppers and eggplant, which then I processed into a sort of paste. I froze this for a sauce for spaghetti or as a base for a soup. We'll see.

The beautiful red peppers made me think of a friend and colleague from NCC, Pat Owen. She was a wonderful writer and a fascinating person, with a life more eventful than one might think from her rather standard matronly looks (though beautiful, I have to add). When she became ill, she moved with her husband to Toronto, their native city. She died a number of years ago, and I should forgive her husband who never even let me know. But I am always saying, "don't should on yourself." Pat is the one who taught me how to roast peppers. Place whole peppers on a oven-proof pan in a very hot pre-heated oven (450 is goood) until charred on one side; then turn to char the other side. Remove carefully from oven and place in a paper bag to steam: the skin will be easy to remove once the peppers are cool enough to handle. Discard skin and sees. Cut into strips and add home-made salad dressing.

In the evening after Michelle left, we watched the MSNBC re-broadcast of most of Pres. Obama's Q&A with a Republican caucus at a social gathering. We think it was one of the most brilliant displays of his excellence we have seen, and each instance is a revelation. The NYT was unaccountably lukewarm this morning. Here is what will probably be a very temporary link, and if you didn't hear it before you can judge for yourself:

http://my.barackobama.com/page/content/obamagopqa/

His approval rating shot up today. Of course it won't stay there.

Today Sergei finished painting the bedroom (2 walls are now bright and light). Why two walls, you may ask? Perhaps I have explained this before. This is called marital compromise. One side (M) says "NO!" and the other (B) says "Yes!" to the idea of redoing the bedroom entirely, and until she can figure out a way to make it palatable to him, they are at a standstill. Simplifying the job made it possible. The main thing is that the two walls (front and closet sides) most in my view are a lovely not-mango color: more orange-peach, says Michelle. I am very very pleased. Michelle approved also, which is a relief because her ideas about what is appropriate stylistically are acute. And the pleasure grows from seeing that Merwin also is pleased, both at my pleasure and in his recognition that the idea of 2 walls did work out. Now the room can be much neater. That's the goal anyway.

This evening we are having an early dinner with Sophie and Brendan Lavin, a special couple in our lives. I am adding two photos of their children. We are going with Sophei and Brendan to Sherwood's, where I look forward to my favorite: GINGER SOUP. It's vegetarian and delicious.

OK, let's see where these images go: even though I have the cursor here, they seem to want to go to the top. Yes, there is the one I love, below the portrait of Gracie, Katie and Sarah: the mystery of it, the distance of the youngest sister. I'll ask Dave how to shift them to the bottom of the post.

Love to all,
B

An eventful day

Michelle is on the left; Rachael on the right, in Chicago, Labor Day.

Dear friends and Family,

Rachael came today to look over my film books; I collected these in the '70s, when I was writing about film and teaching classes—not just about Shakespeare films. I have a large collection of books on theory, descriptions of films, catalogs of collections, etc. Rachael went through these somewhat mystified I think, especially by all the film scripts I have, but she chose about half, which she tucked into two shelves of a glass-front bookcase. The rest will be for Rebecca, our bookseller cousin, if she wants them. Today Rachael's twin sister Michelle will look at the art books and make choices for both of them for the apartment they hope to find in March.

Rachael is an expert preparer of leeks, because she makes the Thanksgiving dish traditional in her family, so I got a tutorial as we made a supper dish together. Usually I don't stick very close to a recipe but working with her I changed this recipe from the Wed. NYT only modestly. Here is our version of Fried Rice:

I had Merwin buy a quart of prepared Jasmine rice from a Chinese restauraant. The recipe suggested that the rice had to be prepared ahead so it would be dry rather than wet.

Prepare 2 T minced garlic (I'd do 4 if I made this again)
and 2 T minced fresh ginger (ditto)
Fry until crisp in peanut oil, and drain on paper towel and reserve for topping

I cut up about 10 oz of mushrooms into a small mince and sauteed them, then drained them over a strainer. Reserve for topping.

Prepare a bunch of leeks by cutting off the unusable ends, leaving only the white and pale green stalk portions. Cut each stalk in half vertically so as to clean them thoroughly and wash under running water to work out any dirt. I always thought this was the tricky part but it's actually quite easy. Dry on towels and slice into half rings about 1/2 " thick. Saute the dried leeks in hot peanut oil until quite soft.

Add the rice, and heat through.

In another pan, soft scramble 4-5 large eggs in peanut oil and add to leek-rice mix.

Serve portions with condiments to be added by each person: the crisp garlic/ginger, the mushrooms, a drop or two of sesame oil, and a drop or 2 of light soy sauce.

We all liked it.

Lincoln was able to join us for dinner, which was a treat. Rachael had to get a train back to NYC before 7, so he had to leave work early to have dinner with us. He then stayed through the evening. He helped me with some computer things and chatted about the furry conference he had just attended. Lots of people had put videos up on Facebook, and he was finding himself in his fox costume in lots of them. 4000 people attended this conference in San Jose!

Part of my day was spent thinking about the Columbia University Shakespeare Seminar (I am a board member). A scheduled speaker for March dropped out, and I suggested to the chairs that I read the paper that had recently been accepted for publication but which I have to adjust somewhat to answer the readers' reservations. I heard last night that the CSS board decided to invite me "enthusiastically." The talk will give me an opportunity to clarify some points and get feedback from some very bright people. I am happy about that. A little doubt creeps in and gets squished: will I be able to read aloud a long paper? I follow my usual path: I plan for the best outcome, enjoy the anticipation, and then if plans have to be changed, I deal with it. Every step has to be savored. I am just sorry that John Mosedale, one of my special Hamlet buddies in the seminar, probably won't be with us. He is very ill.

Oh, there are so many other things I could write about, but there will be more later . . . .


Love to all,
Bernice

Not much news

Dear family and friends,

The event last night for Sean Fanelli at the Crest Hollow Country Club was enjoyable, and most importantly, I didn't even want to leave early. My stamina has much improved. Merwin pointed out that leaving after dessert and before Dr. Fanelli's speech would be smart because at the end of the evening there would be 300 people or more trying to collect coats from 2 coat-check people and others trying to get their cars from the valets. So we left very quietly and were home a little after 9 p.m.

I wore an outfit that didn't get much notice from anyone: it hangs loose on me and so sort of hid the spleen. It's been 10 years since I retired, and I felt I knew only a few people. Merwin, who taught math for a few years there, seemed to know as many as I did. But I heard some nice things about the active learning project that I started so many years ago. The woman from Biology seated on Merwin's right told him that the program has changed her life as a teacher. Nice to hear.

Today I went again to Mimi's class, and it was better for my rib than last time. So I won't mention going to classes anymore. I will plan to go often. Carrying my gear takes a bit of thinking. I pare it down to a minimum. Also now I have a handicapped parking permit so I can park where I don't have to walk too far. Walking itself is not a problem but can be when I am carrying a lot.

I have a Camry that has a pedal problem, a 2007. Toyota was supposed to come up with a fix in January, but I have heard nothing. Should I be driving the car? I will stop into the Toyota dealership tomorrow to ask some questions. Like what is the best thing to do if the pedal jams—hit the off button and risk a rear-end collision?

Also today I got a haircut at last. My wonderful artist hair cutter, Paul, does a wonderful job, and it is such a pleasure to see him. I noticed that though he has stairs going up to the hair level as well as stairs going down to the manicure level (I also had a manicure), and though I had to go up and down a couple of times, I managed it quite well. Very little breathlessness. How nice to feel normal.

For his med-day meal I wanted to make Merwin chicken with crisp skin, and Googled to see what people suggested. Turns out whole chicken works better than pieces, which is what I had. So I dried the pieces as well as I could (since they were slightly frozen still), rolled them in SPIKE, a spice mix, preheated the oven to 500 and baked them for about an hour, turning in between. Merwin liked his meal, and tomorrow I can serve chicken sandwiches to him and our granddaughter Rachael who is coming for a visit. She will be going over my film books and choosing which, if any, she'd like to have. I will save them for her until she has a place to put them.

My remaining books, hundreds of them, are getting neater, and the bedroom is shaping up more in our minds.

Most of my day was spent thinking about and doing some research on the essay I have to revise. It's a puzzler, but I know I will get through it, and enjoy it too.

Love to all,
Bernice

The lower photo is the one I mentioned yesterday. I was a month or so short of 50 (in 1983), a couple of months later I became a grandmother for the first time (Yay, Laura!). These are bike shorts with an overskirt, in case you are wondering. The photo at the top (which I managed to capture but cannot place properly) is me 37 years before; let's say there is a certain attitude in the look. I grew up in Buffalo, in a very tough neighborhood (and I think you can see that the setting is rather slummy). After I graduated from 8th grade, I learned that some boys from our school had tossed the principal out a second story window; he survived. But that is the way things were in our neighborhood.

When I look at the photos of me in the albums we are sorting, I am amazed at the range of my weight. It'll be nice to hide the evidence by tossing out the obese me. I consider myself an obesity success story, mainly through Overeaters' Anonymous. But there was backsliding at times.

Today Sergei finished panting the closet wall of the bedroom. I just love its lightness and brightness, though no one will agree that it is mango (like the Willemses' rooms that I love so much), but it is about as close as I could get.

I went to SPIN this morning, and it was even better and less stressful for my rib than last week's class (I only went once last week). We have a new instructor, Debra, a delightful young woman who has just earned her law degree and, I suppose, is working as a trainer till she passes the bar exam.

Yesterday, my pulmonologist and hem. consulted by phone while we were in the former's office about whether or not I should take a diuretic for my swollen feet, which get so bad sometimes that I can do nothing but put them up on pillows. Evidently the blood condition does not like diuretics, but the doctors decided that I should take them cautiously, no more than one pill in the morning and skipping days when I could. Merwin got the pills, but before I could even take one I noticed this morning that the roundness of the feet was gone; my tendons showed and I could put on my shoes without difficulty. I joked with Merwin that the feet had learned about the diuretic about to be administered and had decided to take matters into their own hands (so to speak).

I have begun tackling the two readers' comments for the essay that has been accepted. I see that they both misunderstood some things (different from each other, however), and thus I must not have been as clear as I had hoped to be. It is helpful to see what people think one is writing, especially when they differ from what one thought she was writing. I already ordered some books from Inter-library Loan. A library friend at NCC, Alicia Sanchez, is very helpful and persistent in getting me books and articles, so I am sure she will come through for me.

We have a big evening tonight, and I have been preparing by resting with my feet higher than my head, but soon I will begin seeing what I can wear. The event is in honor of our retiring president at NCC. Dr. Fanelli was very kind to me when I taught there (till 1999) and afterward as well.

My spleen is so huge it can not be hidden really. Notice how pregnant women these days proudly thrust out their 9-month's belly with skin-tight shirts or dresses? Somehow I think it would be a mistake for me to do that with my end-of-pregnancy-sized spleen. The great thing, though, about being old is that people don't look too carefully, and if they notice anything they are too polite to say anything. Anyway I smile a lot.

Love to all,
Bernice

Another good day

Dear Family and friends,

Today has been a very good day. I am tired now, but that's understandable. I have been going all day long (it's after 9 p.m.). Early this morning I went to Mimi's aerobic class, which I have missed since banging my rib three weeks go. Movement, particularly reaching overhead, is restricted, but I did all right. It was good to move with the others, good to feel myself taking deep breaths. Afterward Elaine and I had a quick coffee at Gila's, always a pleasure.

At one o'clock Merwin and I were at Dr. Janus's office, where I had another chest xray. She was very pleased: there IS progress. The stethoscope sounding was improved, and she showed us the improvements in the new xray. Some of the pneumonia clouds are thinner. So we don't have to return for another month, unless something untoward happens. And even better, we can delay the, as she called it, "dreaded open chest biopsy." I was a little worried abut that, mainly for social reasons: I didn't want a stay in the hospital to ruin so many nice plans we have.

I am to continue the antibiotic, 3x a week, and prednisone 40 mg daily as well. That's a pretty big dose, and it may not be as easy to take for a whole month as it has been for the last couple of weeks. I look a little like a chipmunk, but who cares? Well, actually, I do, but it doesn't matter since it will be temporary, we hope. I am fortunate that Merwin finds no fault in the way I look at any time.

Good news arrived in a couple of other ways. I learned that the big Shakespeare journal, I believe the biggest, has accepted the essay I sent a few months ago. This was very important to me: one of the projects I hoped to complete, and now completion (publication anyway) is in sight. The two anonymous readers both liked it, but of course they had suggestions for improving it too. I will put aside many other things to get at this task, starting tomorrow, I hope. It means going to the NYPL or getting some materials from interlibrary loan.

We heard from our granddaughter Rachael: she plans to come to Glen Head on Thurs. to see us. I have wanted to have her here (rather than as usual meeting her in NYC) because I would like her to pick out any film books she might want from my collection: she is a budding and hard-working cinematographer. Weeding books we don't need gives Merwin and me room to expand other aspects of our collections, like paintings. This is a step toward redecorating the bedroom, one wall of which is now primed in mango or a reasonable equivalent—much better than the dark mahogany walls.

We have been looking at many items not seen for years: one was a pile of completely blank photo albums, waiting to be filled with the thousands of photos we have collected over the years. But no one wants to use such albums any more. Now it's all on the computer. So we are selecting some photos to put in our iPhoto albums.

I'll try to add a photo tomorrow.

Good night,
Love,
Bernice

Another good day

Dear friends and Family,

Yesterday was another good day, with a few hours of work on Measure for Measure with Laury. We are making headway slowly, and today I think I will be able to start in earnest what I call "the front matter," the essays that come before the text of the play begins. Laury will do the performance aspects of this material; I'll handle the historical stuff, which I enjoy.

Merwin and I finished up the day with Emma on TV, a perfect ending. I wasn't able to take the prednisone at 2 a.m. because I was just too full! I was awake but could not stomach the thought of a banana. But I had it at 7 a.m. and am on my way to Mimi's class at the JCC, the first time since the rib, which still hurts a bit, but only at the Tylenol level. Looking forward to a coffee with Elaine afterward.

We're trying to get rid of old papers and such, and of course get caught by photo albums. It's hard to believe that we were ever that young. I'll post a photo as soon as I can remember how to do it!

It's raining heavily, but I have a smile on my face. I could dance, Gene Kelly-ish, but better conserve my energy for the class.

Love to all,
Bernice

Planning works sometimes

Dear Friends and family,

Yesterday went as planned: the prednisone @ 2 a.m. made me wakeful for most of the day, till 8 p.m. Dawn did come over and just left a few minutes ago. We had a great time. I read Dawn's prospectus for her PhD dissertation on Early Modern literature, and I was impressed and delighted. Her ideas are wonderful and her writing superb. Dawn helped us out by moving all the Shakespeare plays from the bedroom to the sitting room. Since we are painting the bedroom (thank you Sergei and Dave!), we need to empty some shelves. I am also trying to eliminate the books (though they are dear friends) that I no longer need or use. Then she corrected her students' papers, and we just hung out together. Did you read about the huge crash of a tank truck yesterday on the LIE? Dawn sort of arrived on the edge of that, unable to use the usual route to get here. A terrible accident. Among many disasters in the news, including Haiti of course.


Before Dawn arrived, Merwin and I went to North Shore Farms to buy leeks, salmon and other goodies for the meals of the day. For lunch I roasted small chunks of zucchini, eggplant (both skin on), a little olive oil and garlic with a little rosemary from the freezer. At the end, after the vegetables were soft, I added a half-jar of good spaghetti sauce I needed to finish and some cut up chunks of manouri cheese. Salad on the side.

For supper Merwin and I made Michèle's salmon packets. I have no idea if I used as much of the leek as possible. It is an easy dish and delicious. All three of us were pleased. North Shore Farms had wild salmon trout whatever that is: young salmon, the fishmonger said. I used butter to sauté the leeks; don't much like margarine. (The recipe is in yesterday's blog.)

I took the prednisone at 2 a.m. again, and woke up ready to go.

All week I have been eager to try the blini featured in last Sunday's NYT Magazine. I put my own spin on them, and we all liked them very much. I made them 3 ways, quite brown on the outside yet soft inside; pale brown on the outside and soft inside, and a thicker oven-baked version, brown only on one side and yet again soft inside. Here is what I did:

Adapted from the NYT:

Optional:
1. Gently warm good maple syrup on a warming burner (for those who like this sweet)
2. and/or drain a cup of ricotta cheese in cheese cloth over a cup, for those who like a more piquant flavor. Refrigerate. Using both is allowed.

Sift together the dry ingredients into a medium sized bowl: since I no longer have a sifter I used a large mesh strainer. The measures should be level.

1/2 t salt
1/2 t baking soda
1 T sugar
1/2 C cake flour:
since I don't use cake flour, I consulted Google for a substitute. In my adaptation, I put 1 T of potato starch in the bottom of a 1/2 C measuring cup and then filled it the rest of the 1/2 C with regular flour.

Mix dry ingredients thoroughly in the bowl. Mix in 16 oz. good thick sour cream. Add 4 large eggs one at a time and mix well. I also added the grated rind of 2 lemons. The mixture is quite thin, so I avoided adding lemon juice (which I often add for my regular pancakes). Refrigerate batter for a 1/2 hour or so (or a day or more if necessary).

Grease (I used butter) and heat a griddle. Drop spoonfuls of batter on the hot pan; turn almost immediately, when blini have the desired degree of brown color. Don't over bake or the inside will not be soft, as it should be.

I also tried the oven method: preheat oven to 500. Grease a 6" iron frying pan with a little butter and place in oven. When the butter begins to smoke, pour in a pancake amount of batter. Bake for 5 minutes. Bottom will be brown, edges crisp, and top pale gold. Turn out onto warm plate.

A lovely day was had by all.

All the best to you, dear friends and family,
Bernice

Lost day

Dear Friends and Family,

I didn't write yesterday because it was such a low-energy day for its first several hours. I did recover towards evening.

I woke up today feeling ready to go, as long as I remain fairly still, sitting at the computer. I decided to try something new with the prednisone: because the energizing effects of the prednisone don't seem to kick in for about 6 hours, I decided to take the 40 mg with a banana at 2 a.m. (I am wakeful because the prednisone is still giving me a boost, I guess). I got up then for good at about 5 a.m. and did feel better than I have. I'll see how the day goes. My aim is to get energized during the day and be able to sleep through the night. Not a bad idea!

Yesterday I started going over old documents and deciding which to keep and which to throw away. My NCC promotion folders are humongous collections. It's nostalgic glancing at them: They record what I did for the 6 years in between each promotion: I was a busy person! They go, except for a few reprints of things I have written. I am hoping to put my Hamlet-related reviews on the website.

And of course I am still thinking recipes. Michèle gave me one for salmon packets, which does indeed sound very easy. She has served a version of this with jullianed zucchini and carrots when we visited her and Raymond in Rouen. I want to try the one with leeks because, believe it or not, I have never made anything with leeks though I like them very much:

She writes: "You need two individual salmon fillets with the skin on and two or three leeks, depending on their size; salt and pepper and a little cream.

"Leeks are no problem: you generally keep only the white part, except for soup. Wash thoroughly under running cold water. Chop them up into small segments and stew them with a little salt and pepper in a little fat (I use margarine, which has a neutral taste unlike olive oil) on a low heat for at least 15 minutes; check that they are soft (I am very empirical). During that time, prepare some foil to make up a parcel with your salmon, skin down, and the vegetables on top. They go in the oven for about ten minutes (depending on the thickness of the fish fillet: again, I am empirical) and then you add some cream before serving, right in the packet."

Another trip to North Shore Farms is in order to get leeks and salmon.

We have nothing specific planned for today but hope that Dawn can visit us.

Love to all,
Bernice

There's a smile on my face

Dear Friends and family,

Not that a smile is unusual for me, but I am rested from a nap at home after the 4-hour transfusion this morning, and I do not hear the boom, boom, ba-boom in my ears! Or at least not very loudly. That's a relief. Little favors.

And when I got home I saw the first primer coat of mango on a bedroom wall. This is going t make the room so much lighter and brighter. I am trying to remove and distribute unneeded books and put up some of the paintings, photos and other pictures that are leaning against walls here and there throughout the house. I do love my books, so full of memories, but my need for so many of them has diminished: others can use them now.

Yesterday was a lightened by Harris and Evelyn, with whom we had a kind of brunch after the water aerobics class that they go to with Merwin. And in my study I managed to part with two huge promotion folders, mementos of years of work at NCC: out to the garbage they went, giving me a little more space on the shelves in my study.

I am looking ahead to spring 2011, if you can believe that! I have suggested to the hamletworks.org team that we propose (by 1 March 2010) a session about our website and issues associated with it for the next Shakespeare Association Meeting. If anyone wants to see the interview about hamletworks.org published in the Shakespeare Newsletter, let me know and I'll mail you a copy.

Spinach pancakes were on the menu: fresh spinach (pre-washed is OK), trimmed and cut up, mixed with enough eggs to hold the leaves together, with enough grated Pecorino Romano cheese added to taste, then dropped in large spoonfuls (3") into hot olive oil in a frying pan. Fry each patty till dark brown on both sides. Drain on paper towel. We love this dish, and the patties make wonderful sandwiches as well.

Another patty: have I mentioned this one? 1 lb can of wild salmon, liquid, bones and all: mash the contents, add a couple of eggs, and bread crumbs, enough so the mix holds together. Drop spoonfuls into hot olive oil. This time I decided to add a chopped scallion, dried parley, and also the cheese, as above. Delicious. Also makes good sandwiches the next day.

Now to work! I am thinking of all of you and hoping all is well. Below are two photos from Merwin's birthday on Dec. 25th, showing the spinach pie Harvey helped make under my direction and the birthday cake Sandy made. Seated around the table on the left, Lincoln opposite Harvey in the plaid shirt and Sandy, Dave on the left opposite Merwin, and me at the head of the table to be close to the kitchen.

Love,
Bernice

Win some, lose some

Dear Friends and Family,

This is mostly medical so if it doesn't interest you, scan down.

Had our visit to the hem. today, and happily there was good news: the best is that Merwin's platelets, which had been up a couple of weeks ago, have subsided again without additional meds—as Dr. K had suspected they would. So he is in good shape.

On the other hand, my hemoglobin is down, so there was a quick rush of events: making an appointment at North Shore Hospital for Thurs. for a transfusion, the earliest they can do it after Long Island Jewish (LIJ) proved to be completely booked for the week. I sure hope the transfusion can be quicker than the 6 hrs the last (which was the first) one took. But at least I know that I need to bring books and ipod.

And the bustle proved that what Pres. Obama has said about e-records saving money. In spite of the fact that North Shore is supposedly connected to LIJ (they go by a combo of both names), because I had my first transfusion at the latter and there is no e-connection between the two systems, we had to dash over to North Shore to do the same blood tests required before a transfusion. The records were there at LIJ, but not accessible. Medicare has to pay twice.

Other med news: the shakiness I experience is prednisone related, as is the weight gain and puffiness. At least it's good to know the cause; when I stop the prednisone these symptoms will disappear.

I got the paper work for a handicapped parking permit: it'll help me when I go anywhere like the JCC. I went there today to SPIN, and my doc. was a little amazed to hear that I did that. But if I control my speed on the bike, I think it helps not only my legs but also my breathing: it forces me to take deep breaths.

The holter monitor revealed nothing to worry about. I have an occasional extra beat, but nothing like a-fib, and I can forget about it. After the hemoglobin comes up, I may no longer have the irritating beat beat be-beat in my ears. So mostly good news.

After the visit to hem and hospital, we dashed home to a lovely lunch of cheese-filled shells. And in an hour or so we will go see a movie on our "free" pass.

Yesterday was a banner day too, because we went to choose the paint for the bedroom, which is now dark paneling. At least two walls, and maybe more, will soon be mango. The big ladder is in place and all is ready to see how this color looks; I was inspired by my favorite color in Michèle and Raymond's lovely home.

And of course little bouts of work and little naps continue through each day. The prednisone seems to have me on a wakeful night, starting at about 3 a.m. Now if only it will do its work for my lungs! Until the lungs are clear, I think have no chance at all of getting into the INCYTE trial.

Love to all,
Bernice

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Concentrating on the good

Dear Frineds and family,

Yesterday was a day that could have been a total loss, but it was saved by a number of positive developments that brightened a low day physically. There were a few really bad hours of fatigue and discomfort, but on to the good!

Lincoln, our number 3 son, visited us for the evening. It was a great pleasure to hear him talk about all his many activities. He is off to a conference in a few days: his hobby since college has been Sci Fi and now is furry fandom. He brought his impressive wolf costume, which he will wear at the conference and also to all kinds of charitable events during the year, like parades and other events for children and seniors.

Lincoln knows how everything works: this has been true of him since early childhood. He helped me with my bewildering cell phone, set up the blue tooth connection in my car so I can pull over and make a phone call if necessary, programmed my favorite radio stations for the car, showed me how to respond to comments on this blog, and more. I think it's great, having four sons, that they are all so different and all so talented and loving.

Our eldest son, Harvey, didn't like the fact that we had only two phones among the 10 rooms of this house and so sent us a system of five phones. Merwin yesterday was able to program the bedroom phone so that it doesn't ring from 11 p.m. to 7 a.m. In the old days, I could always tell my students that they could phone me any time, day or night, because the phone was so far away from the bedroom that I would only respond if I were awake, and they could leave a message. Now I can say that again: phone any time: 516 671 1301.

In spite of fatigue, I managed to go shopping at my favorite super market, North Shore Farms, with Merwin of course. Got some great things, including some more manouri cheese. Made a lovely veggie soup for dinner starting with a base of packaged broccoli soup. The men ate the chicken fingers I had made the night before.

You may have noticed that I like making pancakes. Yesterday's New York Times Magazine had an old recipe for blini and a new variation of it. So naturally I am eager to try one or more versions, which will use up some sour cream I happen to have around.

And on the work front, I sent the group I am in for our SAA seminar a draft of my paper on Overhearing in Measure for Measure. Already this morning, Laury, who is the seminar leader, has commented on the paper. She likes it. And I sent Michèle the paper she will read for me in Le Harve.

And so it goes. Always many things to be happy and grateful for.

Love,
Bernice

Improvements here and there

Dear Friends and Family,

The very good news is that after two weeks of pain/discomfort from the flying leap I accidentally took in the bathroom and into the scale, bruising a rib, I am off of the codeine; plain Tylenol seems to handle it OK. Also, my arthritic thumb has been much improved.

Our son Harvey got us an oxygen measure: it's a little gadget that you put a finger into to see how much oxygen you are getting and what your pulse rate is. Though I feel quite breathless, even when lying in bed, the measure told me this morning that I am actually all right, with an O2 measure of 95 and pulse rate of 76. Not bad at all.

Carmen yesterday in HD film was as wonderful as we had expected it to be. We went with our friend Phyllis, whom we have known since our son Arthur was in nursery school, and we enjoyed not only the opera but being together. The Lativian mezzo-soprano Elina Garanca was absolutely brilliant: beautiful, passionate, sexy. What a far cry from some singers of old who were so heavy that they could not even move from one position to another on the stage! Garanca not only sang magnificently but acted the part believably: she made us understand her nature, her inability to be with one man for long. Everyone was excellent, from the conductor, obviously delighted with the music and his musicians, to the chorus and children. Every once in a while the camera would pull back to show what we would have seen at the Met in our usual $40 seats—a miniscule stage far below us. It's not bad being there in person: the sound is always excellent, but being right up close, seeing facial expressions, was a terrific treat. I hope we can go to the other operas this season.

Today will be quiet: no specific plans except an iChat with our friends in France. I look forward to a good day.

Love to you all,
Bernice

Feeling better

Dear Friends and Family,

Though the news is not better, I am feeling happier about things, probably because I have put myself in the very capable hands of my pulmonologist, the cardiologist (who is our general internist as well), and our dear hem, whom we will see on Tues.

Today I had another chest x-ray, and unfortunately it shows only a little improvement in the clouds in one lung and a worsening of them in the other. So Dr. J decided that PCP was probably not the right diagnosis and put me back on 40 mg. of prednisone, which, she said, will make me feel better very soon. I should be able to breathe at will. That will be nice indeed. She also suggested I cut back on drinking liquids (I am a great drinker of water) to 6 cups including coffee to see if that will ameliorate the swelling in my feet that makes it impossible for me to work for long sitting at my computer. And finally, she sees a real chance that I will need the surgical biopsy of the lungs, which will require a couple of days of hospitalization. I have to figure out when I can work that into our active schedule of friends, family, theater and the like.

I also was fitted today with a 24-hour halter heart monitor, which will help figure out how seriously my heart is working to compensate for the loss of lung tissue. Somehow the prospect of knowing, for better or worse, is better than having trouble breathing without knowing why, or fearing the worst.

Now I can go to the HD opera tomorrow with the halter with the knowledge that things will get better: I will be able to breathe again. Our dear Dawn, fresh from a camping and sight-seeing trip to Hawaii, is coming in the morning, and we will got to the Met opera Carmen together, at a Westbury movie theater, in the afternoon. We couldn't get a ticket to our closer movie theater, in Port Washington. Just the thought of seeing someone I love energizes me. And opera helps too.

I am working on Measure for Measure on two fronts: writing the essay for the Shakespeare Association meeting: this has to be distributed on Jan. 25 to some members of the seminar Laury is leading in the spring. I think it is going fairly well, but I always think that when I am in the midst of writing, and ideas come to me as I explore the main argument I am trying to prove. And at the same time, I am working on the edition of the play that Laury and I are co-editing. I just got tickets for Merwin, Laury and me for the upcoming Theatre for a New Audience production of Measure for Measure on Feb. 14th. I am so looking forward to that. The director is Arin Arbus, who directed a fantastic Othello at TFANA last season.

My friend and colleague Ken R. is also going through a difficult time, but like me he still finds the work on Shakespeare energizing, and he thinks that the essay he is writing for a conference in Brazil, where he intends to give his paper in person, wheelchair and all, is one of the best he has ever written—and he has written much that is wonderful and elegant and true.

Love to all,
Bernice

Thinking things over

Dear Friends and Family,

We had a wonderful couple of days in the City: all the events we planned actually were realized. Dinner at Chowder House, Midsummer Night's Dream ballet as guests of Paul B, at Lincoln Center, lunch the next day at the Algonquin with dear friends Barbara and Kathryn, and even an hour or so in the NYPL. But reality set in also: I can no longer handle the steps in the subway system, so we had to take cabs everywhere. It's the pneumonia and the breathlessness it causes, and also the huge spleen. Also, I can't carry my computer to the library: Merwin has to do it for me. And I walk wherever we have to walk with help from his steady arm. So I feel I have lost my independence. But I am determined to do the best I can. And Merwin is so very good.

Thinking about this loss of independence, I woke up today determined to keep whatever aspect of it I could. This a.m. I drove my car for the first time since injuring the rib. It's been better at night for the last couple of nights, and I decided to go to the JCC for the 6:30 a.m. SPIN class. I had practiced briefly on a bike last week, to see how I could manage. I can't bend from the waist, but I can sit up straight without excess pain. I helped myself by paring down what I had to carry into the gym. The good thing is that the pain in the arthritic thumb seems about gone. Win some, lose some. My friends in the class were happy to see me, the music was great (lively and energizing), and the instructor was terrific and very understanding of my need to do my own thing on the bike. Now I am back home, ready to spend a good day working at the computer. That I can still do without difficulty. I am grateful for all favors that heaven sends, and I am busily planning other outings.

Love,
Bernice

Getting off the Pity Pot

Dear Friends and Family,

Since writing yesterday I have been feeling a bit sorry for myself but am determined to look forward to a happy couple of days in NYC.

What's up today is an evening at the ballet with our friend Paul Bertram, who treats us to wonderful tickets at the American Ballet Co. performances. He's a donor so not only are his tickets wonderful (5th row center), but he also invites us to the donors' collation at the intervals: wonderful cheeses, wine, sweets, nuts. The main thing, though is the ballet: tonight it is Midsummer Night's Dream. In turn, we treat him to dinner at a good restaurant.

Then tomorrow, we have plans to have lunch at the Algonquin Hotel with friends Barbara and Kathryn. I am smiling all over my face just thinking of these convivial pleasures. And I hope to get into the library as well, to order some books for my shelf in the Allen Room, and to see if there are any issues of the Times Literary Supplement for me to look at (and gather information from). We'll be back in Glen Head by early evening, I expect.

My plan to go to the gym early this morning to try a SPIN class fell through because I wasn't feeling up to it. But I have to be reconciled to these little setbacks and enjoy to the fullest what I CAN do.

As usual, a few hours of work yesterday made me feel I am making progress on various fronts. Dear Michèle advised me on my essay for the Le Harve conference in a couple of months, and I was able to revise it accordingly. I don't plan to be at the conference, but Michèle has kindly agreed to read my paper for me.

And so it goes: downs that have to be overcome; ups that give life meaning and purpose.

Love to all,
Bernice

Not much new

Dear Friends and Family,

Yesterday was a very quiet day, mostly just hanging out, reading the Sunday Times. I am determined to get outside, though, at least once a day, so we went to Rising Tide, our lovely organic shop, for their ready-to-eat specialties. We chose salmon, eggplant, and greens; and there are leftovers for lunch today. Once out of the house, I could appreciate the fantastic cloud formations and the setting sun in Sea Cliff at the harbor. It's so good to have these visual treats.

This morning, we went to the gym together. Merwin goes to a water aerobics class. My friend Elaine treated me to a cup of coffee at Gila's cafe at the gym, and I saw and greeted others with real pleasure: it feels like ages since I have been there. I tried a few things I could do without hurting the rib. Breathing is still not exactly normal either: the pneumonia is getting better but is not gone yet. I walked the track, tried the reclining bike, then the treadmill. Dear Mimi, the instructor of the class I am missing, gave me some tips on how to exercise while walking the track. I also stepped into the empty SPIN room to see how it might be to do that exercise. It was OK, as long as I didn't scrunch over. I plan to go to the early a.m. class tomorrow a.m.

Hey, if my 89-year-old friend Gladys who cracked two ribs (not just bruised) is already on a stationary bicycle, I should be able to do it too!

Continuing with recipes:

I posted the recipe for cheese kreplach on 13 Dec. The dough is exactly the same for meat kreplach.

To prepare the filling: Choose a French roast (whatever that is: this is my mother's term; it'll be some cut of chuck) about 2 and 1/2 lbs. Simmer in a small amount of water in a tightly covered pot until it is almost tender. Let cool in its liquid.

Meanwhile or the day before, cook down onions in oil until very soft. My mother's old-world method of softening the onions was to add a pinch of baking soda—not enough to affect the taste. But time will also soften the onions without browning them. Try it both ways to see. Cool the onions.

You can put the meat with liquid and the onions in the refrigerator and continue a day later if you wish.

Grind the meat and onions together; add the liquid from the pot and 1 egg. Put a tsp. or so of the mix on each square of dough. Fold the squares of dough over to make a triangle, and scrunch the edges to seal.

In case you missed the recipe for the dough: it's made with 7 C of flour and 5 eggs, with enough water added to make it pliable. You roll this out quite thin, but not so thin that the filling pokes through.

Ease the kreplach carefully into simmering water (add salt if you use it). Simmer for 10 minutes or so. These can be added to soup. Or lift out kreplach with a slotted spoon, place in lightly greased pan and bake at 350 till brown.

Love to all,
Bernice

More chopped liver, continued

Dear Friends and Family,

I posted the earlier version and then couldn't figure our how to un-post it to continue it, so here is the continuation in a separate post.

Here is what EP had to say about "gribbinis":

"Thanks for gribbinis (my grandmother's pronunciation) recipe. Lived on the stuff back in the 1940s, haven't had it in years. Served over grated black radish or mashed Lima beans in our culinarily-distinguished family. w/ black bread to mop up the schmaltz."

Yum: it almost makes me want to give up being a vegetarian.

Here is a new dish I concocted:

Prepared 1 lb. fuselli noodles the usual way, al dente. Put about 1/2 pound in oiled shallow 8" Pyrex baking dish. Cut up monouri ricotta cheese in small bits and mixed in all over. Added some grated cheese. Baked in oven till hot, then added frozen baby peas (in last few minutes to keep them firm) and broiled to crisp the top. Delicious. The monouri does not melt, as one would expect, but is delectable nonetheless.

Monouri cheese is something we discovered in Greece many years ago. Never saw it in the US, until it began to appear in the best NYC cheese stores. Now our wonderful North Shore Farms in Sea Cliff carries it, very proudly. Monouri ricotta is new to me. The previous version I had was plain manouri, which is like a goat cheese, but with a distinctive flavor. In Greece, we walked into a cheese shop, where only marble counters were visible. When one asked for cheese, a marble lid was lifted, a fork went in and pulled, out of the brine I guess, a hunk of cheese, and you would indicate how much you wanted. Then you would get a loaf of bread in another shop and eat by the roadside a most delicious meal of bread and cheese.

There was a little leftover of the noodle dish, enough for one small meal. So the next night, I added a few more noodles, some more manouri, a little bit of butter and heated it in the micro. I then broke into it two eggs, to make poached eggs, 1 minute more in the micro. This dish was for Merwin, and he liked it a lot: whites solidified, yolks runny.

Today was very special: we went to the MET's HD opera film, "Der Rosenkavalier," with Renée Fleming and Kristinn Sigmundsson. I didn't know if I could last 5 hours, but I did with no trouble. The performance was compelling, as I could tell because I cried during a lot of it. I think I am the only one who does that: artists excelling greatly at what they do make me weep. We had arranged to go with the Dzens with whom we share a wedding anniversary month and year: January 1951. Our friend Doris was there too, and afterward we 5 had a splendid dinner at Bistro Toulous in Port Washington. Really splendid.

Love to all,
Bernice

More chopped liver

Dear Friends and Family,

Rae-Rae sent her mother's recipe, the post-schmaltz version:

My mother would cook the liver with chopped onion in oil, then chop it with hard boiled eggs and mayonnaise.

Dave made his according to my recipe, but since he didn't have enough schmaltz, he used some mayonnaise as well.

Yesterday was grand, highlighted by a gathering of "ladies who Lunch," which is how I think of our monthly meeting at the Jolly Fisherman restaurant. There were nine of us yesterday, and we chatted about movies, books, what we're doing, etc. Lovely and lively. Florence will be leaving this mornign for Florida for three months, and we will miss her.

Chopped Liver

Sorry dear friends and family, not to be posting every day. Just to let you know that when I don't write it means not much is happening, just the usual work and such.

The best parts are phone calls, emails and iChats. On days that I don't leave the house, these contacts keep me happy. I am going to "ladies who lunch" today at the Jolly Fisherman. I so look forward to our monthly gathering. I hope the little snow we had today won't deter anyone from coming.

The blood counts came out pretty well the other day, and I don't have to return to the hem for 2 weeks! That's when Merwin goes to see why his platelets have gone up so much, over 600. My WBC is down to 111 (a far cry from 150+) but still high; and the platelets are over 100: 106 to be exact. So our Dr. K will contact Dr. Raza to see if I can start on the INCYTE trial or whether I have to wait till I am off the prednisone, which I am slowly tapering, 1/2 pill per week (this week 3 and 1/2; next week 3, etc.). The prednisone is giving me nice round cheeks and has increased my weight. And so it goes.

The biggest problem is the damage I did myself to my rib, which is still very painful, right through the codeine I am taking around the clock. Why, of why, did I do that to myself? I think I would be back at the gym if it weren't for my misstep.

I was delighted to hear from Alan and Randy yesterday who gave me encouragement to return to SPIN. I think I will try it soon.

Dave asks for my mother's chopped liver recipe. I am attaching Harvey's mother-in-law's recipe for mock chopped liver as being the healthier option, and quite good. But I also have the recipes for my mother's as well as the recipe for schmaltz. We used a hand grinder to chop the liver, but a hand chopping blade and wooden bowl will also work (after you remove the tough bits from the liver). I suppose the Cuisinart will work also.

Mock Chopped Liver—Lee Stein

3-4 hard-boiled egg whites or whole eggs with yolks.

1 C chopped walnuts (pecans work all right too)

8 oz cooked green beans—cooked till quite soft, approx 15 min. in microwave; use a box of the frozen.

3 heaping C onions sliced, sautéed in oil until almost brown and very soft. 2 packages of the frozen, chopped onions, work OK. Just sauté slowly so that all the moisture evaporates.

Add paprika to onions while they are cooking.

Blend everything in food processor

Salt and pepper to taste, if needed.

This actually tastes pretty good to someone who doesn't eat meat, and is even passable for those who do.

Real Chopped Liver—my mom's

Broil a pound more or less of chicken livers or calves liver until no longer bloody but not dry and hard.

Sauté onions in schmaltz (chicken fat) until very soft and yellow. Is this just as good without schmaltz? I think purists would say “no,” but if there is a cholesterol problems best go with regular sweet oil (Canola) or olive oil.

Hard boil three to four eggs.

Grind all in a food grinder and add salt and lots of pepper. Or hand chop. A Cuisinart may work too, but do not grind until mushy. Add schmaltz until the mix has a fairly smooth consistency. Some chunkiness is better than too smooth.

How much of each ingredient? probably about equal amounts of liver and onions.

Schmaltz (chicken fat)

Tear off pieces of fat from chickens as you use them and keep frozen until you have at least a cup or two of fat.

Render the fat in a pan with about an equal amount of onion, cut into thin slices, halved.

Slowly heat the fat and onions over a small flame being careful not to let the mixture burn. The onion will turn golden, then brown. A small solid bit of fat will get crisp and hard: these are the cracklings or grieven in Yiddish. Strain the mix over cheese cloth. The liquid portion is the schmaltz. This will keep for a long time in the refrigerator where it will solidify. The cracklings and onions can be added to the chopped liver or they are wonderful in mashed potatoes.

I am going on memory, because I have not had meat for years and years.

Lots of love to all,

Bernice

Good medical news

Dear Friends and Family,

Again, this is mostly medical, so skip it if this bores you.

The CT-scan on Mon. showed some good things, not revealed by the x-ray. We got the report yesterday both from Dr. Janus, the pulmonologist, and from Dr. Kurzina, the hem. The lung condition is definitely improving, the clouds diminishing. And though the failure of the various cultures precluded absolute identification of the pneumonia, the very fact that the cultures did not "take" points to PCP, which is the least worrisome, evidently, of possible pneumonias. I am still on the Bactrim and am tapering down on the prednisone, which is giving me apple cheeks and increasing my weight. I am not sure is a further open-chest biopsy will be necessary: perhaps not.

The other good news is that no cracks show in the rib where I fell on Sunday, and that means no danger to the spleen from that event. But it is very painful, and I am taking strong meds for pain, which have their own downside. Sleeping is difficult. I got an additional pain med for night only, but it didn't seem to help much. But this too will pass.

Another piece of good news is that my platelets are up to about 100, the point at which I could be considered for the INCYTE trial. I am eager to try anything that might reduce the spleen size: it is bigger than ever. For Merwin, though, the platelet count has gone up to the 600s, and Dr. K., is concerned about this rise and will see him again in two weeks. If they don't go down, he'll have to take more Hydrea, the chemo that keeps things under control.

We both got our H1N1 shots too. No problem with that so far. OK, that should be it for doctors for this whole week, except I have to phone to see what my WBC (white blood count) is, which will determine when I have to see my hem. again.

Yesterday was Tuesday, free movie day. We got closed out of the Meryl Streep movie, our 1st choice, and decided to see Nine instead. The credits did not come on till the end, and it was fun trying to recognize all the actors in this strange movie, including Judy Dench, Daniel Day Lewis, Sophia Loren and many others. It's a musical, and even Ms. Dench had a musical number. We didn't like it much, however, and can't recommend it. I wonder what others think of it.

Notice that there are no recipes recently; very quiet here on the cooking front.

Love to all,
Bernice

Dr. Janus and lots of medical info

Dear Friends and Family,

Skip this post if you are not interested in the medical aspects of my life. I'll get back to more interesting stuff later.

Yesterday we saw Dr. Janus, the pulmonologist, a delightful young woman. Unfortunately the xray taken in her office showed not much improvement, if any, of the lung condition. The clouds are still there, somewhat fainter in one section, but with new tendrils reaching up towards the top. Still she has to judge by my condition: I can breathe, my oxygenation level is OK, and things are much better than they were when I had to go to the hospital. So my condition has improved. The sad thing is that none of the cultures "took," so there is still no way to know precisely what I have in my lungs. A further procedure will probably be necessary, what is called an open-chest biopsy, which is not as bad as it sounds: it's done arthroscopically (sp.?), but it requires a hospital stay of two days.

Dr. Janus sent us right over to the imagining facility to get another CT-scan, this one without the dye, not only to see better what the clouds were doing but also to check that the rib (which I crashed into on Sunday) did not affect the spleen. Since I was told nothing immediately after the scan, I assume the rib is not cracked and that the spleen has not been damaged. If it were, I'd probably have to be admitted into the hospital. Damage to this huge spleen could be serious. We took the CD of the CT-scan home to make a copy for Harvey and his colleagues at Yale, and we will have a report today when we see Dr. Kurzina, the hematologist.

Today I started to reduce the amount of prednisone. The good thing about this med is that it makes me gain weight, and I had gotten a little too thin. Also it enhances my energy level: yesterday I did not need a single rest in bed. But taking less is better in the long run.

The rib is extremely painful, and was so especially during the night. It's very hard to move around, bend, do the most mundane tasks. Why oh why did I have to make that stupid move on Sunday?

Nevertheless, I cannot help but feel good about progress in my work, both on the hamletworks.org website and Measure for Measure. Sitting quietly at my computer, working, I can forget about the pain (Hydrocodone helps too!). I am thinking about essays I want to write, both those I have committed to already and others that are waiting in the wings. I look forward with pleasure to seeing friends and family. Pollyanna rises again!

Love to all,
Bernice

Oh, she flew through the air . . .

Dear friends and family,

I didn't tell you about the wonderful grab bar Merwin installed in the bathroom, so that I could help myself up from the toilet, probably because I didn't want you all to know that I actually needed such a thing to help me rise. He ordered it from Amazon.com and drilled holes in the tile through the wood behind the tile to mount it—quite a job. But what a help! Every time I use it, I bless him, silently and aloud. So then why oh why did I attempt today to rise without grabbing it? Who knows. Anyway, I found myself tilting as I rose, couldn't right myself, and sort of flew through the air, in the small space of the bathroom, and crashed rib first into the standing scale at the other end, a couple of feet away. Ow! Why didn't I use the grab bar that time when it would have made such a difference? Hurry, I guess. I don't know if I have cracked the rib, but at least I didn't smash the spleen, inches away from the rib. That would have been a real disaster.

We were just on our way to see Avatar when this happened, so I took two Tylenol and off we went, Dave driving. I can't say too much about my joy in seeing this movie. We saw it is 4K resolution, the best available, and the emotion I feel comes from my admiration for the beauty of the piece. Early on my tears flowed and continued throughout. No one, least of all I, can take my tears very seriously, because I cry very easily—at anything sad, beautiful, rich, at anything that marks a supreme artistry, anything awe-inspiring. This movie was all of that. The story is simple and evocative; the execution amazing.

My friend Toby in a recent email extolled the movie Precious and asserted that this is the kind of movie she wants to see: difficult but meaningful, and she added that she had no wish to see Avatar, I guess because it is unreal. It's about as unreal as Hamlet or as any of the works of art that one stands before amazed at MoMA.

Last night we saw a movie on TV, The Soloist, about Nathaniel Ayers, a homeless schizophrenic man who loves Beethoven and is discovered playing on a 2-string violin by a reporter. You probably have heard of it? A true story, and a very sad one indeed. One cannot compare these two movies, really (the only likeness for me is that they both made me cry but that hardly counts), but Avatar is a perfect work of art, and the other is not. I would be happy to see Avatar again. I never want to see The Soloist again.

***

Yesterday, my friend Florence sent over some great veggie soup she had made, and I sent her some spinach pancakes. Fun to have a friend in the neighborhood who is also a member of our synagogue and a classmate at the JCC exercise classes. I am sad that she and her husband Dave are leaving for Florida on Sat. for three months!

Tomorrow we see the Pulmonologist, and I start on the antibiotic 1 pill 3x a week instead of 4x a day around the clock. It was hard sometimes to coordinate the pill time with sleeping and waking, so I am glad that is over. I think she will take a x-ray to see if the clouds in my lungs are gone or at least diminished. I still am a bit breathless if I talk too much, especially on the phone. But yesterday I registered for the Shakespeare Association of America meeting in Chicago April 1st-3rd. I am going to continue to look forward until forced to stop. So though my motto is one day at a time, always, I also plan ahead as if the pleasure will come to pass; in this way, I can enjoy the anticipation and perhaps also the fulfillment.

Finally, I can add that my work on Measure for Measure is going well. I like writing the explanatory notes for students, being careful to be tactful and helpful rather than oppressively scholarly. I want students to feel that they can do this; they can read and enjoy the play. And there continues to be progress on hamletworks.org, including stimulating discussions with colleagues via email. So life is good.

Love to you all,
Bernice

Long time, no post

Dear Friends and family,

It's been a couple of days since I have written, probably because nothing much is happening beyond the usual:

Trying to keep track of the antibiotic I have to take 4x a day around the clock, missing the right time in spite of setting a timer, catching up. I must write down everything or I don't know what I am doing. Today is the last day of round-the-clock. From here on I take 1 pill on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays until they are gone. No more setting an alarm to get up in the middle of the night.

Recipes to try: spinach pancakes a new way, made simply with fresh spinach cut up, eggs and grated parmigiana cheese. Also the plain kind, omitting the cheese. I had that for breakfast this morning. Delicious. The cheese makes the pancakes especially crispy. I put many in the freezer where they can be used for sandwiches or side dishes.

Thursday evening we had an impromptu supper with Laury at Wild Fig, where lentil soup was the chief attraction. I tried my best to get to sleep before midnight, but didn't quite make it. Friday, Sylvia and Marty came, bearing lunch, and we spent a pleasant couple of hours together.

Otherwise, it has been work at the computer, and lots of emails to answer and send. The good news is that distant friends are in our future. Our dear friend Jesús Tronch is coming from Valencia to the Shakespeare Meeting in April, and will stop here on his way. The fates willing, Merwin and I will then go with him to the meeting in Chicago. That's a big IF, I know, but planning ahead is part of how I keep this smile on my face. Even sooner, another Spanish friend, José Ramón, will be visiting us when he is in residence at the Folger Library.

I have a paper on Measure for Measure to write for the Shakespeare conference. But my main work now is two-fold: entering data on our website hamletworks.org and thinking about it as I enter it, and crafting notes for students who might be bewildered about some of the wording in Measure for Measure without swamping them with information. I am trying to be tactful, helpful without being superior. I try to give students the feeling that they can read Shakespeare.

And so it goes. It's lovely to hear from you via email. Please do write to let me know how you are.

Love to all,
Bernice