Up and Down

Though this photo is from 2010 and Audrey is much bigger now, I love seeing Vaughan with her children and grandchildren. As I was writing this, an email message came through from Vaughan! We share the same wavelength.

Dear Friends and Family,

Good: I drove the car today! Merwin and others have thought that I should not drive on my own "in case": what if the car breaks down? What if there is n accident. I am not strong or fast. Today I drove with Sonia at my side. We always begin our day together with a walk on a short block around the house. I thought she would enjoy Sea Cliff Beach, where Merwin and I have been going every afternoon, and I enjoyed telling her, "This is one of the paths I used to run," and as we proceeded to the beach, I would say, "I am still running." I think it's about 8 miles, with many steep hills. She loved the beach walk. It was a cool day, a bit breezy, but very quiet, with a fantastic big sky, mostly overcast.

Bad: The itching proceeds to plague my life. I have already taken 6 one-a-day antihistamines. Something else has to come through for me! Good: I wrote a note about my problem on the MPD listserv and got a large number of responses. Many caring people urged me to stay in the race. Something is bound to help eventually. Can I hang on for that hope? One odd thing, the Gabapentin, which I take for the neuropathy, is also used to prevent itching. But it can also cause itching. It is working for its main purpose, to relieve the nueropathy in my feet that has prevented me from going to the theater, eating out, and anything else that requires me to sit with my legs hanging down for more than an hour. I did not take the 100 mg. dose last night. Itching no better, nueropathy returns.

Good: I continue to enjoy reading Nick M's book on Macbeth, which will help Laury and me write our chapter on the play. Our friend José Ramón from Málaga, Spain, reading in the blog about the troubles with the heavy and illegible Middleton text, has offered to copy and enlarge pages. He owns both volumes, which are in his University office. That is very helpful for Merwin, who is right now not quite up to all the demands I make on him. He is feeling the fatigue that is the expected side-effect of his treatment for the prostate. José Ramón is such an important person is so many directions; he is the one who organized the splendid International Conference on Shakespeare on Film in 1999, whose bibliographic skills are in demand by many all over. He is providing a bibliography/filmography for hamletworks.org. And I am thrilled with the steps my other dear Nick, Nick C, is taking to ensure the continuation of hamletworks.org. We have been talking for years with Pete D. about settling our site into its permanent home at MIT. I think it will actually happen this year.

Good: I have heard from Ron and Kate: they are posting my review of his book The Blogger on their website. Check out RonMcLarty.com in a week or so. Meeting Ron and Kate has been one of the highlights of being a member of the community of scholars and writers who work in the Allan and Wertheim rooms at the New York Public Library. I'll miss that opportunity to make interesting connections.

Mostly good, right? But it is amazing what constant itching can do to affect one's approach to life.

Love,
Bernice